| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. 10:26 - Feb 28 with 12254 views | Lord_Lucan |
Twisted my bloody ankle. It has taken me an hour to crawl to the toilet - I was desperate for a sh1t. Phoned 111 and they were pretty useless, they have suggested I call The Red Cross (I need a wheelchair) but they don't open until 10.30. What is one supposed to do in these situations?
I need help. |  |
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| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 10:29 - Feb 28 with 4239 views | Steve_M |
Anyone around to drive you to A&E? Getting to the car won't be fun (or is that literally impossible?) but I would have thought you'll be ankle to be wheeled out at the hospital. |  |
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| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 10:31 - Feb 28 with 4217 views | GeoffSentence |
If you had phoned me because you were desperate for a sht, I would have told you to crp on the floor, preferably on a hard floor as getting it out of carpet fibres can be tricky. |  |
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| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 10:31 - Feb 28 with 4217 views | The_Romford_Blue |
Who's that guy on here that helped out at the airport thingy the other week
See what he's up to |  |
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| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 10:32 - Feb 28 with 4217 views | Bluebell |
Here we go again. Another ten pager? 
I hope you are ok Lucan. It is surprising how debilitating a twisted ankle can be. You need someone to take you to hospital for an X-ray.
What would TWTD be without your stories?  |  | | |
| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 10:34 - Feb 28 with 4193 views | artsbossbeard |
Are you in God's county or north of the border? |  |
| Please note: prior to hitting the post button, I've double checked for anything that could be construed as "Anti Semitic" and to the best of my knowledge it isn't. Anything deemed to be of a Xenophobic nature is therefore purely accidental or down to your own misconstruing. | | Poll: | Raining in IP8 - shall I get the washing in? |
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| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 10:34 - Feb 28 with 4201 views | Lord_Lucan |
| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 10:29 - Feb 28 by Steve_M |
Anyone around to drive you to A&E? Getting to the car won't be fun (or is that literally impossible?) but I would have thought you'll be ankle to be wheeled out at the hospital. |
Got no car here and on my tod. It's a blooming nightmare, I'll just have to lay down and see what happens. It's ridiculous really, I can't move.
Fecking states we get into. | |
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| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 10:39 - Feb 28 with 4147 views | Lord_Lucan |
| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 10:34 - Feb 28 by artsbossbeard |
Are you in God's county or north of the border? |
I'm in enemy territory, all on my lonesome. It's so daft that I just can't bloody move.
I'm dying for a fag as well. | |
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| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 10:40 - Feb 28 with 4122 views | Steve_M |
| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 10:39 - Feb 28 by Lord_Lucan |
I'm in enemy territory, all on my lonesome. It's so daft that I just can't bloody move.
I'm dying for a fag as well. |
Could you give Norfolk Police a call and see if they'll carry you again? | |
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| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 10:42 - Feb 28 with 4108 views | Benters |
I needed a crap whilst standing on the side of the A12 this morn,i went in the services and had one,whilst in the process of wiping my thumb shot through the paper and the rest is history. |  |
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| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 10:43 - Feb 28 with 4101 views | Lord_Lucan |
| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 10:40 - Feb 28 by Steve_M |
Could you give Norfolk Police a call and see if they'll carry you again? |
I've managed to get to my desk. On my desk I have a tub of salt, a four days old Chinese and half a bottle of red.
The red keeps looking at me. | |
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| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 10:43 - Feb 28 with 4081 views | blueislander |
| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 10:39 - Feb 28 by Lord_Lucan |
I'm in enemy territory, all on my lonesome. It's so daft that I just can't bloody move.
I'm dying for a fag as well. |
What about the sh-t? |  | | |
| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 10:55 - Feb 28 with 3991 views | Methwoldblue |
| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 10:43 - Feb 28 by Lord_Lucan |
I've managed to get to my desk. On my desk I have a tub of salt, a four days old Chinese and half a bottle of red.
The red keeps looking at me. |
Drink the wine, sh1t in the bottle, bish bash bosh, job's a good 'un! | | | |
| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 10:59 - Feb 28 with 3954 views | hoppy |
| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 10:40 - Feb 28 by Steve_M |
Could you give Norfolk Police a call and see if they'll carry you again? |
 Knew I'd get beaten to that one...
Or a couple of stewards would do, wouldn't they? |  |
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| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 11:19 - Feb 28 with 3849 views | Northstandoldie |
| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 10:42 - Feb 28 by Benters |
I needed a crap whilst standing on the side of the A12 this morn,i went in the services and had one,whilst in the process of wiping my thumb shot through the paper and the rest is history. |
Got in touch with your inner self? |  | | |
| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 11:23 - Feb 28 with 3818 views | WeWereZombies |
| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 10:55 - Feb 28 by Methwoldblue |
Drink the wine, sh1t in the bottle, bish bash bosh, job's a good 'un! |
I would have thought it would be better to eat the Chinese and sh1t in the tray rather than try some type of Eastern anal sphincter discipline to crap out a very narrow turd... |  |
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| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 11:32 - Feb 28 with 3752 views | Tollycobbold |
Colostomy bag |  | | |
| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 11:39 - Feb 28 with 3719 views | Guthrum |
| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 11:32 - Feb 28 by Tollycobbold |
Colostomy bag |
I much prefer their second album. |  |
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| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 11:48 - Feb 28 with 3667 views | nodge_blue |
why cant you hop? or use some sort of crutch? |  |
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| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 11:49 - Feb 28 with 3655 views | SWGF |
Don't you have one ankle that's OK, so you could hop?
I've done both my ankles at various times (in various levels of inebriation) and doing your ligaments is absolute ucking agony. 20yrs on, they're still a bit puffy.
Puffy ankles. |  |
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| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 12:09 - Feb 28 with 3574 views | Guthrum |
| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 11:23 - Feb 28 by WeWereZombies |
I would have thought it would be better to eat the Chinese and sh1t in the tray rather than try some type of Eastern anal sphincter discipline to crap out a very narrow turd... |
Eastern Anal Sphincter Discipline - never lived up to the promise of their first LP. | |
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| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 12:13 - Feb 28 with 3554 views | Vic |
| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 10:39 - Feb 28 by Lord_Lucan |
I'm in enemy territory, all on my lonesome. It's so daft that I just can't bloody move.
I'm dying for a fag as well. |
Can you not shift around on you backside or something? |  |
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| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 12:17 - Feb 28 with 3543 views | giant_stow |
| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 10:43 - Feb 28 by Lord_Lucan |
I've managed to get to my desk. On my desk I have a tub of salt, a four days old Chinese and half a bottle of red.
The red keeps looking at me. |
Have you gone to hospital yet, you daft bastard?! |  |
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| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 12:19 - Feb 28 with 3527 views | oldbluestu |
But how will you get to work ? |  | | |
| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 12:30 - Feb 28 with 3485 views | Lord_Lucan |
| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 12:17 - Feb 28 by giant_stow |
Have you gone to hospital yet, you daft bastard?! |
To be honest there is no point really - is there? All they will do is tell me that I've sprained my ankle and flog me off home. I always feel a bit of a fraud going to A&E anyway. You sit there with a minor complaint and next to you is a kid with blood gushing out of his head. | |
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| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 12:36 - Feb 28 with 3439 views | oldbluestu |
| I have had a bit of tumble this morning. on 12:30 - Feb 28 by Lord_Lucan |
To be honest there is no point really - is there? All they will do is tell me that I've sprained my ankle and flog me off home. I always feel a bit of a fraud going to A&E anyway. You sit there with a minor complaint and next to you is a kid with blood gushing out of his head. |
Or they may ask have you been plssed in the the last 3-4 days and don't something stupid given your age like run (well try) onto a football pitch? | | | |
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