| No subject 11:22 - Aug 31 with 21551 views | ipswich78 |
[Post edited 21 Jul 2021 13:10]
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| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 11:25 - Aug 31 with 9676 views | BackToRussia |
If its got to that point, just tell him the next time he brings it up that you'd rather he stopped bringing stuff like this up as you don't agree with his opinions on it and find them upsetting |  |
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| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 11:28 - Aug 31 with 9668 views | factual_blue |
It is more than just age; background, life experiences and so forth all play a part. As for travel, well it can broaden the mind, but doesn't necessarily. |  |
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| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 11:29 - Aug 31 with 9642 views | Nazemariner |
You dont!
You learn to understand that the world was a very different place during his formative years, and that your take on things is not the only one of any importance. |  | | |
| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 11:32 - Aug 31 with 9617 views | textbackup |
Just accept that was the world he grew up in, you don't need to think like that so let him be |  |
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| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 11:32 - Aug 31 with 9613 views | chicoazul |
I'd just accept that he is who he is. |  |
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| on 11:37 - Aug 31 with 9587 views | _ |
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| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 11:39 - Aug 31 with 9566 views | trncbluearmy |
Thinking of him as bigoted does not help, he just may have a point about some things,not everything is fine and dandy about the world we live in now.
The sixties and seventies were a great time to grow up,harder, maybe not as fair,but then again people did not get offended and look to be offended by everything
like your signature by the way, so very true |  | | |
| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 11:42 - Aug 31 with 9528 views | Kitman |
Was he ever in any branch of the military? If so that will explain loads |  |
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| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 11:49 - Aug 31 with 9485 views | tcblue |
Sad to read, 60s means his formative years would have been in the 60s which we are always told were a decade of love and tolerance. I'm not sure we ought to continue making excuses on age basis, the world wasn't much different then.
I would say to just let him know how much you dislike it when he airs those views, and change topic quickly if anything comes up. I did the same with my grandfather after years of trying to make him see the end of Apartheid wasn't the worst thing ever (he used to live in South Africa, well before Apartheid ended and, to my knowledge, never went back after).
It doesn't necessarily make him a bad person, but would changing his views make him a better one? Yes, obviously. | | | |
| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 11:56 - Aug 31 with 9441 views | PJH |
I would appear to be a very similar age to your Dad but my views on the subjects that you mention are certainly not bigoted so I can say that it is not just down to his age.
There are obviously people a lot younger than your Dad and myself that are also bigoted so whilst I cannot offer you any advice on how to deal with it, I can say that it is NOT an age thing. |  | | |
| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 12:01 - Aug 31 with 9392 views | mrshallisfit |
| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 11:49 - Aug 31 by tcblue |
Sad to read, 60s means his formative years would have been in the 60s which we are always told were a decade of love and tolerance. I'm not sure we ought to continue making excuses on age basis, the world wasn't much different then.
I would say to just let him know how much you dislike it when he airs those views, and change topic quickly if anything comes up. I did the same with my grandfather after years of trying to make him see the end of Apartheid wasn't the worst thing ever (he used to live in South Africa, well before Apartheid ended and, to my knowledge, never went back after).
It doesn't necessarily make him a bad person, but would changing his views make him a better one? Yes, obviously. |
1968 - Rivers of Blood speech - which was received positively by millions of Brits. Johnny Speight created the Alf Garnett character deliberately as a comment on how racist most Brits were then. | | | |
| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 12:02 - Aug 31 with 9390 views | Guthrum |
| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 11:49 - Aug 31 by tcblue |
Sad to read, 60s means his formative years would have been in the 60s which we are always told were a decade of love and tolerance. I'm not sure we ought to continue making excuses on age basis, the world wasn't much different then.
I would say to just let him know how much you dislike it when he airs those views, and change topic quickly if anything comes up. I did the same with my grandfather after years of trying to make him see the end of Apartheid wasn't the worst thing ever (he used to live in South Africa, well before Apartheid ended and, to my knowledge, never went back after).
It doesn't necessarily make him a bad person, but would changing his views make him a better one? Yes, obviously. |
Only for a very small sector of the population, right at the end of the decade, was it a time of "peace and love". For most people, it had more in common with the 1950s than the 1970s.
Without knowing him, I'd say the best way of dealing with it is by personal example. Verbal reasoning is unlikely to succeed, certainly on its own. Forthright criticism stands even less chance of changing opinions, while possibly destroying your relationship - which does nobody any good. Gentle pressure over a long period is generally the best way of achieving results. |  |
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| on 12:02 - Aug 31 with 9381 views | _ |
| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 12:01 - Aug 31 by mrshallisfit |
1968 - Rivers of Blood speech - which was received positively by millions of Brits. Johnny Speight created the Alf Garnett character deliberately as a comment on how racist most Brits were then. |
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| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 12:04 - Aug 31 with 9365 views | tcblue |
| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 12:01 - Aug 31 by mrshallisfit |
1968 - Rivers of Blood speech - which was received positively by millions of Brits. Johnny Speight created the Alf Garnett character deliberately as a comment on how racist most Brits were then. |
Right, so in the 60s there was comedy lampooning bigotry - as well as high-profile nobbers spieling racist garbage.
Fast forward to this decade, we have Al Murray and failed politician Nigel Farage.
Age isn't an excuse. | | | |
| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 12:05 - Aug 31 with 9355 views | Blue_Order |
You don't. Just treasure him while he's still here. |  | | |
| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 12:06 - Aug 31 with 9335 views | hype313 |
Your dad's Benters? |  |
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| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 12:10 - Aug 31 with 9310 views | Burwell_Blue |
| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 12:05 - Aug 31 by Blue_Order |
You don't. Just treasure him while he's still here. |
This.
They are his views and shared by millions of others I am sure. That doesn't mean they are wrong, just that you do not agree with them.
Just make the most of him whilst you can. |  | | |
| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 12:14 - Aug 31 with 9273 views | Mullet |
| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 12:10 - Aug 31 by Burwell_Blue |
This.
They are his views and shared by millions of others I am sure. That doesn't mean they are wrong, just that you do not agree with them.
Just make the most of him whilst you can. |
Doesn't mean they are wrong? Yeah it does. |  |
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| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 12:15 - Aug 31 with 9262 views | artsbossbeard |
Just moan about him behind his back when he's out in his taxi. |  |
| Please note: prior to hitting the post button, I've double checked for anything that could be construed as "Anti Semitic" and to the best of my knowledge it isn't. Anything deemed to be of a Xenophobic nature is therefore purely accidental or down to your own misconstruing. | | Poll: | Raining in IP8 - shall I get the washing in? |
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| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 12:23 - Aug 31 with 9222 views | Ryorry |
| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 11:56 - Aug 31 by PJH |
I would appear to be a very similar age to your Dad but my views on the subjects that you mention are certainly not bigoted so I can say that it is not just down to his age.
There are obviously people a lot younger than your Dad and myself that are also bigoted so whilst I cannot offer you any advice on how to deal with it, I can say that it is NOT an age thing. |
I'm about the same age as you, and agree - for our generation it was a matter of the person you are within that is the deciding factor. I hope everyone on here knows that I abhor racism, but my late brother (2 years older than me) worked on Rhodesian railways in the early 70s, and some of the racist things he said in letters home to my Mum utterly shocked and grieved me - so bad that I can't bring myself to mention any examples on here.
My late mother's generation a very different matter though - she'd have been 92 now and grew up in an era where mindsets were completely different, and racism, sadly, was institutional and accepted. |  |
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| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 12:27 - Aug 31 with 9187 views | J2BLUE |
Leave it alone IMO. We're all products of the environment we were brought up in. Race, sexual preference, immigration etc is all irrelevant to me but I can't get my head around things like choosing your pronouns and gender fluid etc. Not looking to start a debate on any of this, just making a point. The world will move on and there might be things you struggle to understand and accept. |  |
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| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 12:31 - Aug 31 with 9167 views | jaykay |
i agree with others on here ,age has nothing to do with it.i am 68 and hate bigotry. althou i dislike some people of all races,but has nothing to do with their colour etc. i think you will find there is a lot of people on here who dont come into my and yours dads generation,who are bigoted.
reading your post ,surprised he is on facebook.
you are a shining example of someone who has formed his own mind and views and not being led by others |  |
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| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 12:32 - Aug 31 with 9163 views | Burwell_Blue |
| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 12:14 - Aug 31 by Mullet |
Doesn't mean they are wrong? Yeah it does. |
*in your opinion* - I think its key to respect all opinions and views despite them not being identical to your own. | | | |
| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 12:40 - Aug 31 with 9077 views | Mullet |
| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 12:32 - Aug 31 by Burwell_Blue |
*in your opinion* - I think its key to respect all opinions and views despite them not being identical to your own. |
Can you give me a good example of a deep rooted bigoted view about race, immigration, sexual preferences that are good? | |
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| How do you deal with a bigoted parent? on 12:42 - Aug 31 with 9059 views | GlasgowBlue |
Is he bigoted? Or is he just a product of a less enlightened age?
I would imagine that in a couple of generations time nobody will hold the views on race and sexual preference that your dad does.
Rather than give him a hard time, love him and spend as many pleasurable hours as you can with him. Because one day he won't be there. |  |
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