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I did it once while an ex was giving me a BJ.... Needless to say she wasn't happy, I on the other hand was rolling about in fits of laughter until she grabbed and bent in anger my 'equipment'
Back in my days at Suffolk College, a female friend told me of her first experience of a 'numerically named night time activity' with her first proper boyfriend. Towards the end of said numerically named activity, where she is on top and he is underneath, he reached his crescendo much to the unexpected surprise of the female. So surprised, it did indeed cause her to fart.
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Where is the worst place to fart ? on 13:03 - Mar 20 with 2234 views
Where is the worst place to fart ? on 11:26 - Mar 20 by WeWereZombies
Years ago I was really worried about flatulence and did a search on the subject, one webpage reassured me that the gas just gets absorbed into intestinal walls if you hold it in.
Been holding it in ever since, bit worried about what happens now when I finally let rip but at least I will be able to walk through doorways again.
A fart with that much potential energy should only be let loose in church
Where is the worst place to fart ? on 23:00 - Mar 19 by wkj
I hope you realise you contradicted yourself with serious, and parish council
Ours must be very different to everyone else's! Good stuff gets done - we've previously persuaded local Council to install better drainage so that our houses are no longer at such risk of flooding as in previous winters; to place grit bins up a steep very minor road which becomes a skating rink in icy conditions and was a fatality waiting to happen; and to grit the minor local roads we live on at least the next day after snow/ice, instead of 2-3 days later.
The embarrassment of farting in those meetings is that the attendees are all neighbours/friends, and if you let one rip, you think they're all smugly smirking at a) having kept theirs in and b) thinking "yeah R, you may be smartened up a bit for this evening, but we all know the reality is that you live in your farm wellies"!
Had a good laugh at this thread. Told the wife I was reading about " Where's the worst place to fart" She replied " You don't half read some sh*t" I said " Yes literally"
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Where is the worst place to fart ? on 18:43 - Mar 20 with 2077 views
Where is the worst place to fart ? on 18:25 - Mar 20 by Whymarkmariner
Had a good laugh at this thread. Told the wife I was reading about " Where's the worst place to fart" She replied " You don't half read some sh*t" I said " Yes literally"
Snap ...reading them out , my missus is in stitches (and farting ! )
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Where is the worst place to fart ? on 18:58 - Mar 20 with 2070 views
A rare comment from me on here but been having a good laugh at this thread. On Saturday morning, whilst viewing a house I let out a cough, an extremely loud fart followed, the wife heard it so it must've have been heard by others. I followed up by scraping my foot on the floor to see if it would replicate the sound, trying to get away with it but it sounded nothing like it, I looked at the missus who was glaring back at me. Oh well, at least we were viewing a house to buy and not the other way round, not sure that would have encouraged too many offers!
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Where is the worst place to fart ? on 19:27 - Mar 20 with 2039 views
Where is the worst place to fart ? on 19:25 - Mar 20 by buryblue77
A rare comment from me on here but been having a good laugh at this thread. On Saturday morning, whilst viewing a house I let out a cough, an extremely loud fart followed, the wife heard it so it must've have been heard by others. I followed up by scraping my foot on the floor to see if it would replicate the sound, trying to get away with it but it sounded nothing like it, I looked at the missus who was glaring back at me. Oh well, at least we were viewing a house to buy and not the other way round, not sure that would have encouraged too many offers!
Did you end up trumping another bidder in the deal?
footers QC - Prosecution Barrister, Hasketon Law Chambers
Where is the worst place to fart ? on 19:27 - Mar 20 by footers
Did you end up trumping another bidder in the deal?
Haha, yeah you could say that, oh well if we don't get that one I will be able to drive past when the new owners are there and have a little chuckle to myself about how I've farted in their house!
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Where is the worst place to fart ? on 20:09 - Mar 20 with 1994 views
I was once on a works trip with one of my old companies and we were in Monte Carlo. A good friend of mine and myself were in the lift in our hotel. A lady got in who looked...familiar shall we say. Anyway, I let go with a trouser cough just before we got out, and it was only as we fell out of the lift laughing we realised it was Shirley Bassey!
We still talk about it to this day on the odd occasion we bump into each other.
[Post edited 20 Mar 2019 20:57]
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Where is the worst place to fart ? on 20:58 - Mar 20 with 1951 views
I was meeting a lovely young ladies mother and step dad for the first time and was a trifle nervous. They entered her living room and he approached me for a handshake. As i rose from the sofa, an involuntary bottom burp Johnny Fartpants would have been proud of silenced the room. He shook my hand firmly and in his thick scouse accent said "Speak up Mr Brown, you,re through." It certainly broke the ice.
We have no village green, or a shop.
It's very, very quiet.
I can walk to the pub.
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