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Times when you miss those who have passed away 21:49 - Jul 11 with 2810 viewsPendejo

I have recently experienced two events where I would have really liked to have to have shared something with someone who 'd passed away recently.

The first was a colleague who passed away suddenly, we weren't great mates but I had worked with him for 14 years. Ironically, he was also the person I'd have gone to to discuss the death of a colleague... Not for tea and sympathy, oh no, for jokes about being "parked up" . A master of irreverent humour, a great release valve.

The other has happened this evening. My youngest offspring has gained a promotion with Lewisham Police Cadets, she'd been promoted to team captain earlier this year, but this evening she was made up to Deputy Head Cadet, Northern Section.

I thought to myself, I wish I could share this with the late JoeSoap. Someone I only met once but corresponded with, he was really interested in youngest offspring's ambitions and progress. By sharing here I'm hoping Joe's spirit in the afterlife has access to TWTD and is reading this... Assuming the pm won't work for him.

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Times when you miss those who have passed away on 21:53 - Jul 11 with 2782 viewsITFC_Forever

I do it all the time with my brother... he passed away just before Christmas 2017, and for months after, I picked my phone up to text him or go to tag him in something on Facebook.

Still think of him dozens of times a day. Was my daughter’s birthday yesterday and various family members popped round, of course he would have been there.

Every time I go for a run, go to stock cars, surf, go to Town games, have a beer.... the list is endless. He’s always there.
[Post edited 12 Jul 2019 9:49]

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Times when you miss those who have passed away on 22:10 - Jul 11 with 2730 viewsFtnfwest

Spookily timed as it was a year yesterday that we lost the old man. Wasn’t the most touchy feely sort but loved his sport and equally would have loved watching the cricket today
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Times when you miss those who have passed away on 22:11 - Jul 11 with 2725 viewsBanksterDebtSlave

Times when you miss those who have passed away on 21:53 - Jul 11 by ITFC_Forever

I do it all the time with my brother... he passed away just before Christmas 2017, and for months after, I picked my phone up to text him or go to tag him in something on Facebook.

Still think of him dozens of times a day. Was my daughter’s birthday yesterday and various family members popped round, of course he would have been there.

Every time I go for a run, go to stock cars, surf, go to Town games, have a beer.... the list is endless. He’s always there.
[Post edited 12 Jul 2019 9:49]


It is Miss Slave's 50th today....first thing she spoke about this morning was her mum and dad both of whom died in the last 8 years. Happy birthday to your daughter.

"They break our legs and tell us to be grateful when they offer us crutches."
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Times when you miss those who have passed away on 22:11 - Jul 11 with 2727 viewsThe_Romford_Blue

There’s so many things I’d have loved to tell my grandad I’m doing.

He was looking forward to the cricket this summer with the World Cup and the ashes. He’d have enjoyed today.

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Times when you miss those who have passed away on 22:13 - Jul 11 with 2708 viewsSitfcB

Times when you miss those who have passed away on 22:11 - Jul 11 by The_Romford_Blue

There’s so many things I’d have loved to tell my grandad I’m doing.

He was looking forward to the cricket this summer with the World Cup and the ashes. He’d have enjoyed today.


Your grandad who went to Villa (a)?
[Post edited 11 Jul 2019 22:14]

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Times when you miss those who have passed away on 22:24 - Jul 11 with 2664 viewsThe_Romford_Blue

Times when you miss those who have passed away on 22:13 - Jul 11 by SitfcB

Your grandad who went to Villa (a)?
[Post edited 11 Jul 2019 22:14]


That’s the one

I gave him a little tribute on that villa away Rommy Report thread a couple of months ago when he died.
The Rommy Report - with a few comments from my grandad by The_Romford_Blue 12 Feb 2017 16:20
I'm not gonna even try and copy the elegance in speech of mullet or Harry (two great reports btw chaps) but will just post as I'm thinking.

Where to start? The team news. Bart, Emmanuel, Knudsen, Chambo, Taylor and Berre. Berre? Who the fook is Berre? They couldn't even be bothered to spell our CBs name correctly. But aside from that, standard starting line up at the back. Midfield of Ward, Diags and Huws was exciting to think about with the memories of reading just 7 days prior. Bales apprentice playing up top with Didz. A recipe for us to get forward with confidence and play some lovely stuff or we would be completely overrun. Only time would tell.

We started ok. Not great. Not bad. Villa looked a threat with the bloke with that strange haircut playing it forward to Kodjia. The latter was causing Taylor problems with some silly fouls being given away. One of those fouls led to a corner which led to Bart making a fantastic save down low to his right. Did he see it late or was it just the speed of the strike that made him seemingly dive later than normal? Who cares. He saved it.

Then Berra had hold of one of the midlanders shirts from a corner which could've been fatal if the ref or the lino decides to be brace and give it. That lino seemed to be constantly give yards behind play. If ever you listen to a stream and the radio commentary at the same time and there's that 3 second delay, that was the link to the play yesterday. Only real thing of note In an average first half was us allowing the bobblehead guy a free shot from a free kick 16 yards out. Crash onto the bar. Phew! Shoutout to the town fan who tried to start a rendition of 'Mick McCarthy your football is sh1t' about three minutes into the game. He was very drunk. He also shouted to Berra within two minutes that 'its time to go back up north'. Tremendous support.

Grandad thought that we were as good as Villa at half time other than a couple of chances for villa earlyish that I've said above. A draw seemed the right result. An average both halves between two mid table teams in honesty.

Second half we looked very sharp - very quickly. Diags was immense at stopping Lansbury and bobblehead and then feeding huws and Ward who ran at players. It was a sight to behold. At the 60 minute mark, my grandad turned to me and said 'you're playing very well second half. Look Better than them so far'. That seems a fair comment. Every time the ball went into the middle of the pitch, it was ending with Town getting forward. We played it on the floor. I can't stress enough how good it was to see us building at pace with players like Knudsen, Emmanuel, Huws, Ward, Diags, Lawrence and Didz linking up. On the floor.

As the game went on, myself and my grandad agreed that we can't let villa back into the ascendancy as the crowd will lift. At the minute, they were turning slowly on their side. They were struggling to deal with the fact that Town looked like they wanted the win more than them. We were the ones having runners from midfield. We were the ones playing it in their half.

It seemed appropriate that the goal came from a villa player worrying about Lawrence allowing yet another runner from midfield in Huws busting his b0llocks to get on the end of Didzs pinpoint cross/pass to cause pandemonium. As you will have noted, my grandad was in attendance. It was his Christmas present from myself. He loves a day out at the football but hasn't been in an away end since 1985. We'd planned to go to the front row and he could sit and I'd stand. However the people in those seats wanted them so we found ourselves in the middle of the lower tier. We had to see if his knees would cope with standing for 90 minutes. Thankfully they did. The point I'm making is that as we scored, the away end went crazy. People jumping on each other as usual like at Sheffield Wednesday, Charlton and Watford. As I turned to my left, i saw something that absolutely made the day for me. My grandad was like every other town fan jumping around with complete strangers from the town behind us with the biggest smile on his face. That for me was worth it even if villa had scored two in injury time. Thankfully they didn't.

On the train home, which we got stuck in delays because of 'overhead wire failures' and had to go via Northampton meaning the journey to London was double the time. More time to discuss the game as we'd done in less detail at a local Tesco a cafe waiting for the train. '100% deserved the 3 points based on that second half performance' said my grandad. Hard to disagree even for villa fans who, to their credit, agreed it was coming. From 70 minutes on, villa had (in assuming) far less possession than we did and we just had to hope we'd make that one chance from it. Massive credit to Huws as we saw the replay for the goal on the train. 'I'll tell you what that's one hell of a finish to hit that mid-stride'. Well said. It's one thing busting the gut, but it's a different challenge entirely to keep composure as 2000 town fans breathed inwards in mass anticipation. 1 big chance. 1 huge goal. Get f*cking in!

Days out like yesterday tell me exactly why I spend my cash going to places like Barnsley to watch us. You doubt your sanity after the Derby game. I lost my head that night questioning what the f*ck we were doing signing a loanee. 'A loanee. Another f*cking loanee' was what I posted on here. Can I just have it on record that I'm so so SO glad we made that signing. That signing was Huws.

Asides from the footy, the hotdog was different to normal. As well as being about two times bigger than the roll, it had a sweeter taste than normal hotdogs. I have to give it an 8/10. Well done Villa. On the way home, asides from a hot chhocolate at Tesco cafe, we found an outlet selling food at Birmingham new street station. 'Two sausage rolls please' said my grandad. Incredibly their was two jumbo ones for £3 or some poshboy ones that were like a quarter of the size for £3.89. 'Seasoned with herbs' was their excuse according to the tag. What's that about?

My grandad has now seen us 7 times, including the Watford, Charlton and yesterday late winners, with 6 wins. He obviously loved his first taste of an away end in 32 years as we've sorted out him coming to Fulham away with me in April where he will be amongst the riff raff of town fans once against.

Hotdog - 8
Sausage roll - 9
Day out - 10
Last minute winner - 10
Seeing my grandads face for the goal - 1684552

[Post edited 11 Jul 2019 22:28]

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Times when you miss those who have passed away on 22:45 - Jul 11 with 2614 viewsWestover

On my birthday 24th June my dad passed away (many years ago ) as did my partner's mother so not a happy day for us.
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Times when you miss those who have passed away on 00:17 - Jul 12 with 2518 viewsvapour_trail

My dad passed away a couple of weeks ago and we said goodbye to him yesterday. He had fewer of his faculties over the past five years or so, but I’m already having the sensation of not being able to share stuff.

I’ll remind him whenever we beat his beloved Ireland at anything, that’s for sure.

Thanks Pendejo. And love to everyone here associated with joesoap.

Trailing vapour since 1999.
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Times when you miss those who have passed away on 01:11 - Jul 12 with 2473 viewsThe_Romford_Blue

Times when you miss those who have passed away on 00:17 - Jul 12 by vapour_trail

My dad passed away a couple of weeks ago and we said goodbye to him yesterday. He had fewer of his faculties over the past five years or so, but I’m already having the sensation of not being able to share stuff.

I’ll remind him whenever we beat his beloved Ireland at anything, that’s for sure.

Thanks Pendejo. And love to everyone here associated with joesoap.


Sorry to hear that mate. All the best

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Times when you miss those who have passed away on 06:50 - Jul 12 with 2339 viewsSitfcB

Times when you miss those who have passed away on 22:24 - Jul 11 by The_Romford_Blue

That’s the one

I gave him a little tribute on that villa away Rommy Report thread a couple of months ago when he died.
The Rommy Report - with a few comments from my grandad by The_Romford_Blue 12 Feb 2017 16:20
I'm not gonna even try and copy the elegance in speech of mullet or Harry (two great reports btw chaps) but will just post as I'm thinking.

Where to start? The team news. Bart, Emmanuel, Knudsen, Chambo, Taylor and Berre. Berre? Who the fook is Berre? They couldn't even be bothered to spell our CBs name correctly. But aside from that, standard starting line up at the back. Midfield of Ward, Diags and Huws was exciting to think about with the memories of reading just 7 days prior. Bales apprentice playing up top with Didz. A recipe for us to get forward with confidence and play some lovely stuff or we would be completely overrun. Only time would tell.

We started ok. Not great. Not bad. Villa looked a threat with the bloke with that strange haircut playing it forward to Kodjia. The latter was causing Taylor problems with some silly fouls being given away. One of those fouls led to a corner which led to Bart making a fantastic save down low to his right. Did he see it late or was it just the speed of the strike that made him seemingly dive later than normal? Who cares. He saved it.

Then Berra had hold of one of the midlanders shirts from a corner which could've been fatal if the ref or the lino decides to be brace and give it. That lino seemed to be constantly give yards behind play. If ever you listen to a stream and the radio commentary at the same time and there's that 3 second delay, that was the link to the play yesterday. Only real thing of note In an average first half was us allowing the bobblehead guy a free shot from a free kick 16 yards out. Crash onto the bar. Phew! Shoutout to the town fan who tried to start a rendition of 'Mick McCarthy your football is sh1t' about three minutes into the game. He was very drunk. He also shouted to Berra within two minutes that 'its time to go back up north'. Tremendous support.

Grandad thought that we were as good as Villa at half time other than a couple of chances for villa earlyish that I've said above. A draw seemed the right result. An average both halves between two mid table teams in honesty.

Second half we looked very sharp - very quickly. Diags was immense at stopping Lansbury and bobblehead and then feeding huws and Ward who ran at players. It was a sight to behold. At the 60 minute mark, my grandad turned to me and said 'you're playing very well second half. Look Better than them so far'. That seems a fair comment. Every time the ball went into the middle of the pitch, it was ending with Town getting forward. We played it on the floor. I can't stress enough how good it was to see us building at pace with players like Knudsen, Emmanuel, Huws, Ward, Diags, Lawrence and Didz linking up. On the floor.

As the game went on, myself and my grandad agreed that we can't let villa back into the ascendancy as the crowd will lift. At the minute, they were turning slowly on their side. They were struggling to deal with the fact that Town looked like they wanted the win more than them. We were the ones having runners from midfield. We were the ones playing it in their half.

It seemed appropriate that the goal came from a villa player worrying about Lawrence allowing yet another runner from midfield in Huws busting his b0llocks to get on the end of Didzs pinpoint cross/pass to cause pandemonium. As you will have noted, my grandad was in attendance. It was his Christmas present from myself. He loves a day out at the football but hasn't been in an away end since 1985. We'd planned to go to the front row and he could sit and I'd stand. However the people in those seats wanted them so we found ourselves in the middle of the lower tier. We had to see if his knees would cope with standing for 90 minutes. Thankfully they did. The point I'm making is that as we scored, the away end went crazy. People jumping on each other as usual like at Sheffield Wednesday, Charlton and Watford. As I turned to my left, i saw something that absolutely made the day for me. My grandad was like every other town fan jumping around with complete strangers from the town behind us with the biggest smile on his face. That for me was worth it even if villa had scored two in injury time. Thankfully they didn't.

On the train home, which we got stuck in delays because of 'overhead wire failures' and had to go via Northampton meaning the journey to London was double the time. More time to discuss the game as we'd done in less detail at a local Tesco a cafe waiting for the train. '100% deserved the 3 points based on that second half performance' said my grandad. Hard to disagree even for villa fans who, to their credit, agreed it was coming. From 70 minutes on, villa had (in assuming) far less possession than we did and we just had to hope we'd make that one chance from it. Massive credit to Huws as we saw the replay for the goal on the train. 'I'll tell you what that's one hell of a finish to hit that mid-stride'. Well said. It's one thing busting the gut, but it's a different challenge entirely to keep composure as 2000 town fans breathed inwards in mass anticipation. 1 big chance. 1 huge goal. Get f*cking in!

Days out like yesterday tell me exactly why I spend my cash going to places like Barnsley to watch us. You doubt your sanity after the Derby game. I lost my head that night questioning what the f*ck we were doing signing a loanee. 'A loanee. Another f*cking loanee' was what I posted on here. Can I just have it on record that I'm so so SO glad we made that signing. That signing was Huws.

Asides from the footy, the hotdog was different to normal. As well as being about two times bigger than the roll, it had a sweeter taste than normal hotdogs. I have to give it an 8/10. Well done Villa. On the way home, asides from a hot chhocolate at Tesco cafe, we found an outlet selling food at Birmingham new street station. 'Two sausage rolls please' said my grandad. Incredibly their was two jumbo ones for £3 or some poshboy ones that were like a quarter of the size for £3.89. 'Seasoned with herbs' was their excuse according to the tag. What's that about?

My grandad has now seen us 7 times, including the Watford, Charlton and yesterday late winners, with 6 wins. He obviously loved his first taste of an away end in 32 years as we've sorted out him coming to Fulham away with me in April where he will be amongst the riff raff of town fans once against.

Hotdog - 8
Sausage roll - 9
Day out - 10
Last minute winner - 10
Seeing my grandads face for the goal - 1684552

[Post edited 11 Jul 2019 22:28]


I don’t get to see ‘bumped’ threads.

I’m sorry to hear that mate, belated condolences.

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Times when you miss those who have passed away on 07:07 - Jul 12 with 2319 viewsDanTheMan

Anytime I see a poignant father-son moment, whether in real life or on TV, I'm kind of reminded on what I'm missing. My father passed away when I was 11 so it's not like I never got any but it stills gets to me nearly two decades later.

I'd already lost my mother so it hit me pretty hard. Looking back I really should have got some therapy or something as a kid but my sister and I basically did the whole stiff upper lip thing.

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Times when you miss those who have passed away on 07:50 - Jul 12 with 2251 viewsBanksterDebtSlave

Times when you miss those who have passed away on 07:07 - Jul 12 by DanTheMan

Anytime I see a poignant father-son moment, whether in real life or on TV, I'm kind of reminded on what I'm missing. My father passed away when I was 11 so it's not like I never got any but it stills gets to me nearly two decades later.

I'd already lost my mother so it hit me pretty hard. Looking back I really should have got some therapy or something as a kid but my sister and I basically did the whole stiff upper lip thing.


Was it offered and/or available to you? We know some kids currently in the same position who are similarly resisting talking about how they feel. I can only imagine how tough it was/is for you and them.

"They break our legs and tell us to be grateful when they offer us crutches."
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Times when you miss those who have passed away on 08:03 - Jul 12 with 2228 viewsGlasgowBlue

Times when you miss those who have passed away on 00:17 - Jul 12 by vapour_trail

My dad passed away a couple of weeks ago and we said goodbye to him yesterday. He had fewer of his faculties over the past five years or so, but I’m already having the sensation of not being able to share stuff.

I’ll remind him whenever we beat his beloved Ireland at anything, that’s for sure.

Thanks Pendejo. And love to everyone here associated with joesoap.


Sorry to hear that. I remember you saying he had been unwell a couple of years ago.

This post is quite spooky timing as just last night I wanted to burst into tears when watching an old clip of Virginia Wade win Wimbledon. I couldn't understand why.

It’s been happening to me a few times when I’ve been watching old stuff in TV. Then I realised it’s because I watched this stuff with my parents when I was a kid and I really miss them both.

Funny how the m8nd works.

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Times when you miss those who have passed away on 09:20 - Jul 12 with 2178 viewsBlueBadger

My maternal grandad, pretty much every day.

A true gentleman of the Bobby Robson school. Faultlessly gracious and polite to all but not one to allow himself to be trampled on either. Always immaculately presented, a kind word for everyone and a generosity of spirit that is still inspiring.

There's not a day goes by I don't miss my best mate, it's been difficult just writing this, such is the void the man's left in the 15 years since he died.
[Post edited 12 Jul 2019 9:36]

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Times when you miss those who have passed away on 09:39 - Jul 12 with 2136 viewspennyfathersleg

My Grandad!

If it wasn’t for him, I wouldn’t be a Town fan, or football fan in fact. He was a massive Leyton Orient fan and he took me to watch them when I was about 10, I was amazed with the spectacle and of a ‘live’ football match. I still have a big soft spot for them (so sad about Justin Edinburgh).

He always used to talk me about all sport (no one else in my family were really into sport). He absolutely loved cricket and used to spend ages teaching me the field placements (still don’t get them 🤣). I have memories of him in his bedroom, spending hours, listening to TMS. I would loved to have to picked up the phone to him yesterday to discuss England beating the Aussies, he would have been so happy (and I’m sure he is whilst watching down)
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Times when you miss those who have passed away on 09:45 - Jul 12 with 2136 viewsHeathlander

My mother who passed away a couple of years ago. She was always the first person I shared good news with. Would have loved to tell her about my daughter's graduation, new jobs, promotions, kids doing well. All that sort of thing.
I miss chats over coffee with her talking about the wider family. Her house was an escape from the rest of the world and somewhere I could always go.
She's still the first person I think of when I have some news to share.
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Times when you miss those who have passed away on 10:06 - Jul 12 with 2104 viewsBluebell

Times when you miss those who have passed away on 09:45 - Jul 12 by Heathlander

My mother who passed away a couple of years ago. She was always the first person I shared good news with. Would have loved to tell her about my daughter's graduation, new jobs, promotions, kids doing well. All that sort of thing.
I miss chats over coffee with her talking about the wider family. Her house was an escape from the rest of the world and somewhere I could always go.
She's still the first person I think of when I have some news to share.


This is how I feel about my mother.

I really miss telling her about the family and their achievements. She was the one person everyone would go to with problems and things certainly seemed better when discussed with her. She was always positive and made everyone smile, always had made cakes and the kettle went on for tea as soon as you walked in the door.

After dad died I phoned her every day at 6 in the evening. Even though she has been gone 8 years now, I still often pick up the phone and dial her number by mistake.
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Times when you miss those who have passed away on 10:16 - Jul 12 with 2094 viewsdusseldorf_blue

My father passed away whilst I was living in the US, it was so hard at the time as I was so far away, it happened so suddenly a massive stroke and that was it, he wasn't even 70.

Also a sport freak and would have loved watching the cricket.

In hindsight I consider myself lucky as 3 weeks before I was home and went to game versus Charlton, won 2-0 and Shefki came on as a sub only to limp off. So my last memories of my Dad is a few beers and an afternoon out at Portman Road.

My mother has been suffering from Dementia for some time now and is already for a while at the stage where she is not aware of her surroundings or who is there, in some respects she is 'dead', I know that sounds really harsh but maybe some people who have been in similar circumstances will understand. Also have a massive guilty feeling as living in a foreign country a lot of the nitty gritty stuff is left to my siblings who live close by........
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Times when you miss those who have passed away on 11:34 - Jul 12 with 2031 viewsDanTheMan

Times when you miss those who have passed away on 07:50 - Jul 12 by BanksterDebtSlave

Was it offered and/or available to you? We know some kids currently in the same position who are similarly resisting talking about how they feel. I can only imagine how tough it was/is for you and them.


I remember a social worker coming and basically asking if I was OK. Think that's as far as it went.

And I think that was more to do with my step mum adopting me rather than how I was dealing with my grief.

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Times when you miss those who have passed away on 22:02 - Jul 12 with 1924 viewsvapour_trail

Times when you miss those who have passed away on 00:17 - Jul 12 by vapour_trail

My dad passed away a couple of weeks ago and we said goodbye to him yesterday. He had fewer of his faculties over the past five years or so, but I’m already having the sensation of not being able to share stuff.

I’ll remind him whenever we beat his beloved Ireland at anything, that’s for sure.

Thanks Pendejo. And love to everyone here associated with joesoap.


Thank you for replies, reactions and messages. Genuinely had meant not to go there with this but was prompted by the thread and late hour.

Trailing vapour since 1999.
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