| The Warky Report: The extra bit as an explanation - dedicated to Bankster (H &am 17:41 - Nov 21 with 734 views | Warkystache |
Hi all
So it was the international weekend and some of you might've thought 'Warky's not bothered. England games, not really anything special, friendlies in all but name'. And you'd be right. But it was slightly more than just that....
I'm currently writing this at 5.15pm on Saturday. We've won jammily. More tomorrow. I'm at Tel's later at 7.30pm. We're having steaks and Negronis and a laugh. More tomorrow. I promise. It'll be funnier than the game (unless you like sadomasochism, in which case carry on nailing your b*llocks to that dungeon wall dressed in rubber).
I watched the Sunderland match on Ifollow. Fumed at the final whistle. They were crap. We were robbed. Etc, etc. I didn't post because everyone felt the same. I didn't watch with Tel. He'd already decided the 'Online fing' wasn't for him. The last vestiges of any Town support drained physically like the bloody last drippings off the wife when she was 'on' and used to come to bed wearing stained knickers. Yes, it's all part of the magic. Ladies, I have been married, disastrously, ruinously married. Married when I yearned not to be. It was her affairs that ended it. Or 'affair' singular. We just decided meekly that we weren't right. It was the biggest copout of my life. Alas, human weakness purports greater wisdom than human strength.
So, anyway, we lost at Sunderland. Then, on the Wednesday, came the call. I was working from home and my uncle, aged 68 and sounding concerned, rang to ask me if my dad was at home. No, I said. Everything alright? No, he said. Your aunt's suffered a massive coronary in the night. He woke up to find her next to him, struggling to breathe, skin blueish, eyes sunk. Called 999. They took an hour. Defibrillator. Rushed to Southampton General. Uncle said, slightly humorously "They started doing the heart pump stuff and she let one off, real pearler, rattled the ambulance like a tropical storm. Well, we've been eating a lot of veg lately. The smell! It was like the chimp quarters at the zoo".
Anyway, she's home now. Being cared for by carers who nip in for an hour, smelling faintly of fags and Thierry Mugler. They prop her up in bed, feed her, administer medicine and then leave for some other poor needy who wants her dressings changed or her potty pushed.
I cared for her for a while. My uncle works in London. My cousins work further afield. I called my boss and explained. We're in lockdown. I took my laptop and accoutrements down there and sat working from their home in Fleet. Their internet connection was better. All I had to do was feed her and roll her to prevent bedsores. She's due for stent surgery. Gawd alone knows when. Once the government decide that lockdowns aren't really the answer to massive Northern cases, I guess.
So that's why I've been absent. Still, I've not missed much. An extra-time defeat in the cup and three lacklustre England games. Fleet's better than home though. Aside from the M3, it's actually a very nice village. I've got to know the local newsagent quite well........ |  |
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| The Warky Report: The extra bit as an explanation - dedicated to Bankster (H &am on 17:46 - Nov 21 with 713 views | Ftnfwest |
All the best to her and glad you’re ok. Must admit I thought it would be something far worse like you’ve got some bird on the go! |  | | |
| The Warky Report: The extra bit as an explanation - dedicated to Bankster (H &am on 18:40 - Nov 21 with 642 views | BanksterDebtSlave |
Good to have you back Warky....glad you are ok, have a fun evening, possibly even more fun than the football if that is possible! |  |
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| The Warky Report: The extra bit as an explanation - dedicated to Bankster (H &am on 22:08 - Nov 21 with 573 views | allezlesbleus |
"The last vestiges of any Town support drained physically like the bloody last drippings off the wife when she was 'on' and used to come to bed wearing stained knickers."
One quote I never expected to read on a football forum!
It seems so strange reading this, from just across the water, with England and France both in "lockdown". We're at 23 days into the 2nd confinement. Apart from a couple of visits to the shops in that time, I have only seen the wife and kids and the postman. That's it. Apart from seeing the odd person whilst on our 1km, 1 hour maximum excercise per day. It seems so weird hearing that you are off to Tel's for dinner and drinks......and yes, I am extremely envious. |  | | |
| The Warky Report: The extra bit as an explanation - dedicated to Bankster (H &am on 06:52 - Nov 22 with 484 views | witchdoctor |
take care mate...👠|  | | |
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