| "You looked so gay" 12:22 - May 1 with 8725 views | colchesterchris |
Is using the term gay in this way acceptable in 21st Century Britain? I'm not for a minute suggesting that everyone who uses it in this way is a homophobe, but is it homophobic to use the term in that way?
This isn't "virtue signalling", I'm genuinely interested in the strength of views either way as for me the answer is yes, it is homophobic, and completely unhelpful for those struggling to deal with a wide range of issues to be.
The fact that there aren't any openly gay pro footballers in the UK would appear to back up that football forums/grounds aren't as inclusive as wider society either. [Post edited 1 May 2017 12:35]
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| "You looked so gay", "stop being so gay" on 12:30 - May 1 with 3833 views | J2BLUE |
Why have you added "stop being so gay" which is clearly quite negative to "you looked gay" which is what this thread is actually based on? |  |
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| "You looked so gay", "stop being so gay" on 12:31 - May 1 with 3830 views | Mullet |
Hmmm, think you were right on the other thread to be honest.
The problem is it's the commonality of language that causes the issue. I hear kids and mates use it all the time without thinking, let alone associating it with anything homophobic. It all depends on your audience and intent I'd say.
Football is still so backward it's shameful - what I can never work out is if the bigots on a Saturday afternoon get through life being the same way Mon-Fri. Why a terrace is the appropriate venue to open up such attitudes is interesting in itself. |  |
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| "You looked so gay", "stop being so gay" on 12:32 - May 1 with 3815 views | taximan |
who cares ?
if this is something that is genuinely bothering you then i suggest your life is either pretty much care free, or you need to get out more | | | |
| "You looked so gay", "stop being so gay" on 12:33 - May 1 with 3814 views | colchesterchris |
| "You looked so gay", "stop being so gay" on 12:30 - May 1 by J2BLUE |
Why have you added "stop being so gay" which is clearly quite negative to "you looked gay" which is what this thread is actually based on? |
I was trying to make it less about the one poster on that thread, and more widely about society in general. Hence the different thread. I take your point though as it changes the question, so will change it. | |
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| "You looked so gay", "stop being so gay" on 12:37 - May 1 with 3762 views | BlueBadger |
| "You looked so gay", "stop being so gay" on 12:32 - May 1 by taximan |
who cares ?
if this is something that is genuinely bothering you then i suggest your life is either pretty much care free, or you need to get out more |
I dunno about anyone else, but I reckon that treating your fellow humans with a bit of basic respect is pretty important. |  |
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| "You looked so gay", "stop being so gay" on 12:38 - May 1 with 3742 views | taximan |
| "You looked so gay", "stop being so gay" on 12:33 - May 1 by colchesterchris |
I was trying to make it less about the one poster on that thread, and more widely about society in general. Hence the different thread. I take your point though as it changes the question, so will change it. |
i've just read most your other b0ll0x on that thread
so basically you are just looking to be offended, on the gays behalf | | | |
| "You looked so gay", "stop being so gay" on 12:39 - May 1 with 3742 views | colchesterchris |
| "You looked so gay", "stop being so gay" on 12:32 - May 1 by taximan |
who cares ?
if this is something that is genuinely bothering you then i suggest your life is either pretty much care free, or you need to get out more |
Are you seriously suggesting that being at all passionate about LGBT+ rights / inequality means I need to get a life? | |
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| "You looked so gay", "stop being so gay" on 12:40 - May 1 with 3711 views | taximan |
| "You looked so gay", "stop being so gay" on 12:39 - May 1 by colchesterchris |
Are you seriously suggesting that being at all passionate about LGBT+ rights / inequality means I need to get a life? |
yeah
go and have a few pints or something
stop trying to be offended | | | |
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| "You looked so gay", "stop being so gay" on 12:41 - May 1 with 3710 views | BlueBadger |
| "You looked so gay", "stop being so gay" on 12:38 - May 1 by taximan |
i've just read most your other b0ll0x on that thread
so basically you are just looking to be offended, on the gays behalf |
So, what's actually YOUR problem here? The lad doesn't like people being treated with a basic lack of respect, I'm not sure why it matters if he's gay or not. | |
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| "You looked so gay" on 12:41 - May 1 with 3706 views | Dolly2.0 |
I think you're technically correct but in reality the gay community will have far more to worry about than a meaningless quip like those you mention. Gay guy I work with wouldn't be offended. There's far worse banter than that in the office and he often revels in it. |  |
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| "You looked so gay", "stop being so gay" on 12:42 - May 1 with 3694 views | Mullet |
| "You looked so gay", "stop being so gay" on 12:41 - May 1 by BlueBadger |
So, what's actually YOUR problem here? The lad doesn't like people being treated with a basic lack of respect, I'm not sure why it matters if he's gay or not. |
Seems "talking b0ll0x" and "being offended". I can only conclude he is worried about the competition on here. | |
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| "You looked so gay", "stop being so gay" on 12:43 - May 1 with 3678 views | taximan |
| "You looked so gay", "stop being so gay" on 12:41 - May 1 by BlueBadger |
So, what's actually YOUR problem here? The lad doesn't like people being treated with a basic lack of respect, I'm not sure why it matters if he's gay or not. |
who gives a sh1t if anyone is gay, straight, bi or whatever
that is my point mr p
no problem whatsoever | | | |
| "You looked so gay", "stop being so gay" on 12:43 - May 1 with 3674 views | BlueBadger |
| "You looked so gay", "stop being so gay" on 12:42 - May 1 by Mullet |
Seems "talking b0ll0x" and "being offended". I can only conclude he is worried about the competition on here. |
If he's genuinely worried about people talking b0llocks on the internet, he's definitely on the wrong website. | |
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| "You looked so gay", "stop being so gay" on 12:44 - May 1 with 3655 views | colchesterchris |
| "You looked so gay", "stop being so gay" on 12:31 - May 1 by Mullet |
Hmmm, think you were right on the other thread to be honest.
The problem is it's the commonality of language that causes the issue. I hear kids and mates use it all the time without thinking, let alone associating it with anything homophobic. It all depends on your audience and intent I'd say.
Football is still so backward it's shameful - what I can never work out is if the bigots on a Saturday afternoon get through life being the same way Mon-Fri. Why a terrace is the appropriate venue to open up such attitudes is interesting in itself. |
I agree with the point on language. My dad would say similar if we were out as it would have been socially acceptable to do so in the past, and he (and many others) have just been left behind by how quickly it shifts.
In the modern world of social media, forums etc, "audience" isn't as fixed a term as it used to be and there is an unintended audience to anything posted online.
Yep, and that's not just in relation to sexuality. It's cringe worthy listening to some of the chants when you have a female assistant referee for instance. | |
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| "You looked so gay" on 12:46 - May 1 with 3627 views | colchesterchris |
| "You looked so gay" on 12:41 - May 1 by Dolly2.0 |
I think you're technically correct but in reality the gay community will have far more to worry about than a meaningless quip like those you mention. Gay guy I work with wouldn't be offended. There's far worse banter than that in the office and he often revels in it. |
Fair point, but that only applies to the openly gay community, rather than those who still feel unable to come out? These quips only reinforce social stereotypes of what being gay is supposed to look like... | |
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| "You looked so gay" on 12:49 - May 1 with 3627 views | artsbossbeard |
To put things into perspective, I was in a cocktail bar drinking a creamy purple coloured drink with a half of a passion fruit floating on top. From a cocktail glass.
I wasn't offended one bit by Lucan's comment and I'm full 100% hetro. |  |
| Please note: prior to hitting the post button, I've double checked for anything that could be construed as "Anti Semitic" and to the best of my knowledge it isn't. Anything deemed to be of a Xenophobic nature is therefore purely accidental or down to your own misconstruing. | | Poll: | Raining in IP8 - shall I get the washing in? |
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| "You looked so gay" on 13:03 - May 1 with 3506 views | J2BLUE |
| "You looked so gay" on 12:46 - May 1 by colchesterchris |
Fair point, but that only applies to the openly gay community, rather than those who still feel unable to come out? These quips only reinforce social stereotypes of what being gay is supposed to look like... |
I can see what you're doing and I respect it but I just completely disagree here. I don't think it's about what 'it's supposed to look like'. I think light-heartedly taking the piss out of certain traits that many (not all) gay men have is the ultimate acceptance. Obviously when it isn't light-hearted it becomes an issue but in this context it's not. IMO. | |
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| "You looked so gay", "stop being so gay" on 13:13 - May 1 with 3443 views | Throbbe |
| "You looked so gay", "stop being so gay" on 12:38 - May 1 by taximan |
i've just read most your other b0ll0x on that thread
so basically you are just looking to be offended, on the gays behalf |
Yeah, he should stop being so black about it, the massive Jew.
(Blatantly stolen from Simon Amstel)
More seriously, I'm uncomfortable with gay being used as a pejorative, and wouldn't do it myself. Not convinced I'd have called Lucan on it, as nothing he's ever posted has made me think he's homophobic, but I definately see the op's point of view.
I tend to place accusations of Virtue Signalling in the same category as Political Correctness or complaining about people doing good - best ignored. |  |
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| "You looked so gay" on 13:23 - May 1 with 3385 views | Superfrans |
| "You looked so gay" on 12:41 - May 1 by Dolly2.0 |
I think you're technically correct but in reality the gay community will have far more to worry about than a meaningless quip like those you mention. Gay guy I work with wouldn't be offended. There's far worse banter than that in the office and he often revels in it. |
I know a few people who would be offended if someone used said phrase.
For one thing, what does gay look like? I work with a few people who are gay. They don't look any different.
And, of course, we all know that in the playground, the use of such a phrase is always designed as a slur, a derogatory form of address.
To draw a comparison - if someone said to a certain other poster on here, "Oh stop being such a cabbie," we know that he would ask what's wrong with being a taxi driver?
it is odd that those who ask people to stop being offended - are usually the ones who are most easily offended... |  |
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| "You looked so gay" on 13:26 - May 1 with 3362 views | Superfrans |
| "You looked so gay" on 12:46 - May 1 by colchesterchris |
Fair point, but that only applies to the openly gay community, rather than those who still feel unable to come out? These quips only reinforce social stereotypes of what being gay is supposed to look like... |
There are also plenty of people (most gay men and women, in fact) who don't feel that their sexual preference is the most important thing about them, their defining characteristic. | |
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| "You looked so gay" on 13:28 - May 1 with 3347 views | monytowbray |
| "You looked so gay" on 12:49 - May 1 by artsbossbeard |
To put things into perspective, I was in a cocktail bar drinking a creamy purple coloured drink with a half of a passion fruit floating on top. From a cocktail glass.
I wasn't offended one bit by Lucan's comment and I'm full 100% hetro. |
Only someone a little bit curious would claim to be "full 100% hetro". |  |
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| "You looked so gay" on 14:11 - May 1 with 3203 views | Dolly2.0 |
| "You looked so gay" on 12:46 - May 1 by colchesterchris |
Fair point, but that only applies to the openly gay community, rather than those who still feel unable to come out? These quips only reinforce social stereotypes of what being gay is supposed to look like... |
Yeah good point. I don't know anyone not out, for obvious reasons! | |
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| (No subject) on 14:14 - May 1 with 3184 views | factual_blue |
| "You looked so gay", "stop being so gay" on 12:37 - May 1 by BlueBadger |
I dunno about anyone else, but I reckon that treating your fellow humans with a bit of basic respect is pretty important. |
To have fellow human beings, you first have to be a human being.
#justsaying.
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| "You looked so gay" on 14:23 - May 1 with 3164 views | Dolly2.0 |
| "You looked so gay" on 13:23 - May 1 by Superfrans |
I know a few people who would be offended if someone used said phrase.
For one thing, what does gay look like? I work with a few people who are gay. They don't look any different.
And, of course, we all know that in the playground, the use of such a phrase is always designed as a slur, a derogatory form of address.
To draw a comparison - if someone said to a certain other poster on here, "Oh stop being such a cabbie," we know that he would ask what's wrong with being a taxi driver?
it is odd that those who ask people to stop being offended - are usually the ones who are most easily offended... |
"For one thing, what does gay look like? I work with a few people who are gay. They don't look any different."
Oh come on, do you really not know? My gay mate has said before about another homosexual, "he's a bit too gay for me" or "he's overly gay".
I don't believe you don't know what that means.
Of course, that's not the same for all gay people. | |
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| "You looked so gay" on 14:28 - May 1 with 3130 views | GavTWTD |
| "You looked so gay" on 14:23 - May 1 by Dolly2.0 |
"For one thing, what does gay look like? I work with a few people who are gay. They don't look any different."
Oh come on, do you really not know? My gay mate has said before about another homosexual, "he's a bit too gay for me" or "he's overly gay".
I don't believe you don't know what that means.
Of course, that's not the same for all gay people. |
Effeminate? |  |
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