|OldGit's Team v Brum|
by Old_Git at 17:59 18 Aug 2014
GERKENCHAMBERSBERRASMITHCLARKEANDERSONHYAMHEWITTMINGSMURPHYSAMMONSubstitutes: BIALKOWSKI PARR LAWRENCE BISHOP TABB MCGOLDICK HENSHALL
Clarke is Ready whereas Mings is just not defending so may as well be released into the wild to do his hunter-gathering but if he does not perform with some professionalism he will be replaced at half-time by TheLittlePrincess, Alexandra Henshall who has a shimmy and 'a lightning turn of speed' altho he doesn't look up and he's too small but we are only intending to finish mid-table so we can afford to indulge the odd lad that can Play Football. Please, Mick, you bore.
Similarly, if Clarke sinks, Parr will be ready. But Clarkey won't sink.
McG will also be coming on at half-time but I accept that he needs a rest and Bálint Bajner is a joke and Mazza has gone. Thus, let us feast on dull Sammon.
Bálint's fellow joke-signing is not even on the bench, Kévin Bru.
Hewitt is class, class, class but too gormless so this is his last chance; I shall send him back to Gillingham if he cannot produce more oomph.
I will replace Hewitt with TheGingerBishop who has really been polished over the summer. He really has become One To Watch.
Anderson achieves no more than Lee Martin but I quite like to watch a street footballer just playing for the fun of it. He has partially spoiled my fun by removing his beard. Beards are despicably beautiful.
All that pitter-patter running by Jay Tabb creates a world in miniature but it fulfils no more footballing purpose that Andoe running diagonally and beardlessly to nowhere.
No Cole Exkuse ? TWTD has at last caught up with my feelings of ennui about the surrender-monkey. This league is about beating similarly mediocre teams and, to achieve that modest aim, we must press forwards, leave defence to the defence. Skuse proberly needs a rest, leave him in Suffolk. Scapegoat him, beardless troll.
Notice Byron Lawrence on the bench ahead of the fractionally richer man's Kévin Bru, Anthony Wordsworth. Byron's too small but he's a Proper Footballer who needs just this tiny scrap of encouragement; he has suffered too many slaps. I won't be bringing him on but don't tell him that.