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Gun left on plane
at 14:15 19 Sep 2020

Apparently, Dominic Raab's minder left his loaded handgun on the plane they had been travelling on

The late and rather wonderful citizen of Boxford, Tornado Smith, used to carry a loaded handgun with him when he performed the Wall of Death stunt with his pet lioness "Briton" in the sidecar. He said it was in case the lioness went mad and he had to shoot her

Presumably that is why Raab's minder has to carry a loaded gun, in case the Foreign Sec goes Doolally and has to be put down with a bullet to the brain

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Meanwhile, in Finland....
at 18:52 12 Jul 2020

Just talking to a mate of mine who works there

The Government have relaxed the strict 2 metre rule and the Finns are delighted

They can now go back to standing the more comfortable 5 metres apart

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Burn Melania, Burn
at 10:19 9 Jul 2020

Vandals set fire to wooden effigy of Flotus...

https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2020/jul/09/melania-trump-statue-set-on-fire

It's a surprisingly good likeness

Although the effigy has more expressive and mobile facial features

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Last Train to Clarkesville
at 18:25 10 Jun 2020

Just a rip off of jangly Beatles sound....

Or an anti Vietnam Protest

Clarksville being a Us Army depot that processed numerous Vietnam draftees

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Johnson to take charge
at 09:47 3 Jun 2020

Absolutely unbelievable.....

Somehow I had assumed that the blond idiot already was in charge and our tardy and ineffective response to CV was down to his bumbling incompetence

Turns out that he is only now taking over the reins

https://www.msn.com/en-gb/news/coronavirus/exclusive-boris-johnson-takes-back-co

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So, how come....
at 17:48 25 May 2020

Our Masters and Overlords seem so uninspiring?

Classic Dom just seemed so limp, so uninspiring, just so f**king ordinary

It's like the people who want to lead us to a Glorious New Future are selling a dream they do not embody

I rather suspect that Dom has only one testicle

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Rose Garden
at 17:25 25 May 2020

So....f**k all roses that I can see

About the same number of apologies

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Espoo
at 18:08 17 May 2020

I am on an online dating site, trying to kickstart my car-crash love life

Along with the more usual lasses from places nearby, Gloucester, Cheltenham, Hereford....the computer selects a couple of more distant potentials.

This particular one is a bit of a Babe, she says she lives in Espoo

Clearly, there is no such place, she is Aving A Larf

Without consulting google maps or similar...do you reckon Espoo exists? If so, where is it?

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Sewage Testing
at 18:05 11 May 2020

So....it seems that sewage will be tested to monitor for any local flare-ups of CV

I trust that the Government will be carrying out this task assiduously

Not just going through the motions

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KJ
at 19:22 5 May 2020

Anyone heard from Hoppy today ?

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Sinatra Classic
at 10:41 30 Apr 2020

The skies are grey...mega death stalks our fair isle

Here is the incomparable Mrs Miller turning her talents to a Frankie classic

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Quick tech question
at 09:59 30 Apr 2020

I'm trying to put a live link in a new post...the one where it appears in blue when I've written it

But it only comes as text, doesn't generate the YouTube box

What do I need to do to please

Thnx

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Healthy Eating....Caesar Salad
at 19:55 17 Apr 2020

Maybe I should use this lockdown to overhaul my diet....out goes bacon roll, in with healthy salad

So I settled on having Caesar Salad for supper

I wasn't sure of the ingredients, but it turns out that you can buy small tins of Caesar in the supermarket; I chose rabbit and liver flavour

Well, it was awful...I knew I should have chosen the chicken

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Toilet Roll Shortage
at 20:15 1 Apr 2020

Just been chatting on the phone to a mate, big family and a bit strapped for cash. Shortage of basics is starting he said

He's run out of toilet paper, had to improvise and he used a lettuce leaf

The tip of the iceberg, he says

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Government Advice
at 09:13 29 Mar 2020

The Government has today sent out an e mail detailing the safe use of Pork Luncheon Meat and Corned Beef during the current CV situation

If you haven't received said e mail.....

Check your spam

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Self-Isolation
at 18:51 20 Mar 2020

Bit of a cough and a very ill advised moustache/beard make over, I have decided to go into a period of not leaving the house, not meeting anybody and generally being a miserabilist b*gger

Or normal life as I call it

To fill my hours, I expand my knowledge of the design features of elderly aeroplanes with Greg

Enjoy

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Cool Accountant
at 16:53 6 Jan 2020

Went to see my Accountant today, self employed yada yada

Silver haired fella, slight Scottish accent

Turns out that he went to the same Glasgow school as J Wark….played against/with him numerous times at schoolboy level

Says that Warky, even at those tender years, could hit a deadball harder and more accurately than anyone else

Pretty cool, huh?

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And for anyone missing Jo Swinson
at 19:46 13 Dec 2019

We have the delightful Melanie Harrold

With a song of heartache and tears

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Tune...for anyone else unhappy this evening
at 19:34 13 Dec 2019

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Ticket needed for Saturday
at 09:04 5 Dec 2019

Hi

A mate needs a ticket for Cov (a) on Saturday

Will they be available on the day on the gate?

Not Ipswich based, bloody miles from Planet Blue

TIA

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EdwardStone

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