| The Warky Premier Report: Injured (H) 10:35 - Sep 8 with 1491 views | Warkystache |
Bloody International two-weeker. Just as you’re all set for the season, along it comes, the most boring break known to man (apart from smoking breaks if you’re a non-smoker, and I think I qualify, probably. Not had one for a week. This isn’t due to moral fibre; more in a mo) as you attempt to sustain the footy rush after the summer by watching the Scots and the Welsh and England and a bit of Leagues One and Two.
So it’s been walking. A lot of walking. Along the graffitied prom at Harwich, an early morn stroll after parking the car somewhere on the seafront near the old Hi-de-Hi camp, no Big Ted Bovis in his rat-catcher suit or Peggy the nutty chalet maid accompanying me, just the occasional jogger (in Harwich? They’ve done suspected witches for less) and the floaty seagulls and their raucous screeches following the fat-man-sized blur as it receded into the wind.
I like Harwich. It is the harbinger of an unfair local reputation as a bit of a sh**-hole, like much of Essex, only it’s probably done with a pinch of the truth. Most of Essex beyond the M25 is crap. New build Potton mock-Tudor and used-car sales and escaping cockneys. Compared to the North of the county, steeped in rolling countryside and Georgian townhouses and soft burrs and even softer heads, Essex is like a Starling. Raucous, wide-boy, but look at the glorious sheen on the feathers.
Harwich, while a town in decline and with a drug problem more productive than Walter White’s meth labs, has an easy-going charm you tend to find a lot around here. It used to be the setting of Tel’s former career in newsagent-based retail. He still retains an affection for the place (although he’s never been back since moving, ‘Christ no, rarver circumsize meself wiv one o’ the wife’s leg shavers’) and he still knows a few local characters.
I stopped smoking. Mainly because, in the excitement of Liam Delap’s screamer last Saturday, I appear to have taken a blow to the left ribcage which has left me in pain all week and breathing has been a bit harder as a result. I guess the drink numbed it last weekend, although I definitely felt it on Sunday evening. It still hurts. Apparently, there’s not a lot the NHS can do (consulted my local pharmacist, who, in the absence of waiting two weeks to see my GP on something I suspected was spurious, confirmed he’d broken three ribs once canoeing and they took a while to heal. No ointments, unguents or strappings improved it). Tel’s apparently broken a rib gardening. He wasn’t very sympathetic either. He recommended Deep Heat if I wanted to explore the potential of the pain, particularly the increase of it. I thanked him as mirthlessly as I could.
My colleagues in Birmingham, apart from remarking that I’ve been walking like I’ve followed through, all seem to have broken ribs at various points in their lives, no doubt doing energetic and thrusting stuff rather than being the poor unsuspecting victim of a carelessly controlled elbow. The Villa fans took the Michael when I explained how I’d done it. “It’ll have well healed by the time you’ll need to celebrate again” said one. Hope they fall at the first Champions League hurdle.
Tel’s gearing up for Spain next week. Marbella for two weeks of hopeful sunshine and non-cost-of-living affected beers and food in various bars whilst admiring the sea. I can do that in Harwich, although, admittedly, the weather’s gone mercifully cooler. He leaves on Wednesday with Mrs Tel and is back on Thursday before our game against Villa. We caught up for a meal on Friday, me noticeably slower moving from the back seat of his 4x4, Mrs Tel looking slimmer in grey YSL sweatshirt and deep blue Adidas joggers (off to play badminton with Sandy).
So that was my international break. I tried to get enthused about watching non-league footy but didn’t manage to in the end. Been there and done that. Besides, it’s no fun with constant aches in the old breadbasket.
See you all after Brighton away. I’m not going. Even though I’d have liked to. Just get the old ominous feeling that we may experience another harsh PL away-day. Still, you never know. |  |
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| The Warky Premier Report: Injured (H) on 11:11 - Sep 8 with 1376 views | Pendejo |
Bruised ribs eh?
Can empathise. Twice within a month last season.
On way to Plymouth, overreaching for something in a campervan, wasn't using the ladder.
Then just as that was subsiding a young Ecuadorian magician scored a late late goal and one of those stray bedlam elbows in Cobbold A left me fighting for breath. |  |
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| The Warky Premier Report: Injured (H) on 12:54 - Sep 8 with 1263 views | Warkystache |
| The Warky Premier Report: Injured (H) on 11:11 - Sep 8 by Pendejo |
Bruised ribs eh?
Can empathise. Twice within a month last season.
On way to Plymouth, overreaching for something in a campervan, wasn't using the ladder.
Then just as that was subsiding a young Ecuadorian magician scored a late late goal and one of those stray bedlam elbows in Cobbold A left me fighting for breath. |
How long does the pain last? It's improving now but I made the mistake of laying on my left side in bed last night and that started this constant dull ache up again. | |
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| The Warky Premier Report: Injured (H) on 16:10 - Sep 8 with 1122 views | NthQldITFC |
| The Warky Premier Report: Injured (H) on 12:54 - Sep 8 by Warkystache |
How long does the pain last? It's improving now but I made the mistake of laying on my left side in bed last night and that started this constant dull ache up again. |
Does she have no sympathy? |  |
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| The Warky Premier Report: Injured (H) on 16:30 - Sep 8 with 1087 views | farkenhell |
| The Warky Premier Report: Injured (H) on 12:54 - Sep 8 by Warkystache |
How long does the pain last? It's improving now but I made the mistake of laying on my left side in bed last night and that started this constant dull ache up again. |
I broke a rib saving my baby daughter from falling off our bed (17 years later, I have wished on more than one occasion that I hadn't bothered). From a fading (failing?) memory, I think the pain lasted about a week. |  | | |
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