With new manager speculation at fever pitch and so many alluring names who may have thrown their hats into some alleged ring, or perhaps been bumped up in the odds due to a flurry of misplaced fivers, it’s time to step back and assess the relevant claims of the hopefuls.

Taking them in no particular order, Danny Cowley comes with a brother while the others, as far as can be ascertained, do not. If they are desperate they could perhaps mention their brother, or sister even, in their applications.

Steven Gerrard and Frank Lampard come with venerable nicknames such as Stevie G and Lamps, so that’s a good start. The former might require two-way translation on coming to Suffolk, but Lamps, though said to be the possessor of something called an IQ, would not be the man because, as is well known, they could not be fitted into the same team, or perhaps, room.

But if instead it’s low-key we’re after, Jack Ross has taken St Mirren from the bottom of the Scottish Championship to the top without anyone discovering where St Mirren actually is.

Meanwhile, I would urge caution over Maurice Steijn unless he allows cameras and microphones back into the pressers because, if not, Town fans will be permanently split over whether to pronounce him Steen, Stine or Stain.

If it’s to be Paul Cook, then he wouldn’t have stayed in Wigan very long, and that only places him as one of thousands - so nothing special there.

Then there is that composite gnarled veteran McPardew: while his West Brom did not taste victory in aeons, using all his imparted gnarled wisdom, they have now beaten the gnarled, but not so wise, Mourinho’s United. So he’d leave a good legacy and also not need to be photographed under a brolly as it rains much less in East Anglia.

And so to some with Town connections - Kuqi, McGreal and Unsworth. Although Shefki has been lost to the greater public gaze whilst operating in Finland’s lesser leagues, he has long shared his great desire to celebrate his first Town managerial victory at the cost ruining the most expensive suit he would be able to muster on whatever pittance Marcus Evans. might offer.

McGreal’s Colchester sit 11th in League Two, but if they win all their last three games and Mansfield, Coventry and Lincoln lose all theirs, the U’s might just squeeze into the play-offs

And finally, David Unsworth. From Liverpool certainly, but not famous – so that’s alright then.

Such a deep pool of talent, so much to back up their competing claims. I leave it to you, good reader to crown that coming king.

Ardentitfc1978 added 11:20 - Apr 20 Arsene Wenger is available for next season.
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armchaircritic59 added 23:38 - Apr 20 Nice to see some tongue in cheek humour on here. We can all do with a laugh!
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bluesman added 06:11 - Apr 21 Please call Mick and say sorry Mr Evans. Then give the poor man some money to spend
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Nthsuffolkblue added 11:37 - Apr 22 Some clever stuff here. Hadn't thought about that with Steijn but if he was to get it we would at least immediately be able to spot those pundits who didn't like us as they would pronounce it as stain for sure. You missed both the ones I would prefer. Mogga and Jones. Mogga belongs in the list of those with Town connections. Nathan Jones has been gone too long of course.

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armchaircritic59 added 17:32 - Apr 22 Nthsuffolkblue, that's a supreme joke (for those of us of a certain vintage)!
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crinkle added 09:31 - May 7 i go back to Scott Duncan so know all about "good football" 1-0 up so into Portman road Ossy .This talk of Marcus Evans..... I notice no complainant has offered the millions to buy him out,He saved the club from extinction and is still pouring money into the club.
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