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Following on from Baxter's thread about linesman recently thought I'd share this experience from Sunday with the forum. Was watching my son play in their latest EJA U13 league game when an opposing parent near me questioned a couple of linesman decisions for offside against their team, but was saying it loud enough for everyone to hear including our own linesman. I couldn't help myself, thought I might point out that being a linesman is a tough job and being 40 yards away and not in line with those decisions you can't see if it was offside from his position. I felt I didn't even say it in a condescending or confrontational way - the voice of reason or so I thought! The response was just a rant of expletives and how dare I even speak to him as I don't even know him! He was eventually taken away by one of the more sensible supporters, but why do we need to put up with such utter crap by some parents? The fact that this adult thought it ok to use foul language with young children on the touch line and not batter an eyelid was a concern. Football just seems to encourage the worst out of some and it seems that it doesn't even have to be at the professional level either! Just thought the whole episode was completely embarrassing, however didn't ask him what he thought though!
There's some FA protocol required for this rather than just shouting back at the perpetrator and antagonising things further.
All FA Chartered Clubs "should" make parents sign a Parents Charter each season, which commits said parents to an acceptable standard of spectating and encourages positive voices from the sidelines, breaches of this are supposed to be fed back to your club officials at the game, so that they can advise the guilty parents accordingly.
Yes, it all sounds ultra PC and it's difficult in the spur of the moment but that's the FA guideline on such matters and this can all be backed up by a ref's report & club officials' statements, if necessary. Don't forget that the Respect campaign is still very much alive.
Here's one for you, my U14's have been drawn in a cup match against a team that we regularly spank heavily - I get no enjoyment out of this by the way, it's just that there's such a gulf between the boys. The upshot is that should we win this game, the draw pits us against one of the top teams in the region and some of my lads are talking about taking a tactical loss and concentrating on the league, so that they avoid this game but I can't do this.
Not because I don't want to lose a game of football, I simply couldn't contemplate the team that we beat regularly coming up against this team, it would be a car crash. We'll take one on the chin and maybe learn something whilst we're at it. Maybe.
Please note: prior to hitting the post button, I've double checked for anything that could be construed as "Anti Semitic" and to the best of my knowledge it isn't. Anything deemed to be of a Xenophobic nature is therefore purely accidental or down to your own misconstruing.
When children are often brought into the world of football, by their parents taking them to see the team they support (which I suspect is what the majority of children experience), where grown men including their parents are shouting and swearing at referees and linesman, it's not a surprise although still shocking to witness this behaviour outside of that football ground.
My daughter has started with an under 11s girls side this season, and so far so good from this point of view. I suspect it will become more aggressive as in futures seasons, or perhaps it's just boys football?
My son has played youth football for a number of years now, he's currently at U11 level. TBF it happens a lot less than you're led to believe and I've found on the rare occasions it does happen it's usually quickly dealt with quietly by the referee (official or a parent helping out) or parents on the sidelines themselves.
Ideally you don't want to be too confrontational because the chances are it could end up in a situation you really don't want to happen in front of kids.
That said there's a couple of teams in the Ipswich area that are known for it, when it happens the report usually goes into the FA.
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Why are parents so aggressive when watching their child play? on 10:14 - Sep 26 with 3710 views
Why are parents so aggressive when watching their child play? on 10:14 - Sep 26 by hype313
The sooner we educate our children to respect the authority in sport like we do in Rugby the better IMO.
We have young lads normally ref our games and they really don't have the kahuna's to tell the boys off.
I had one of my parents ref a game recently as the ref called off ill at the last minute and he was brilliant, the oppo manager asked if he'd ref their games going forward. He'd never reffed before either.
The first lad who questioned his decision with arms raised and an "oh my God!!", was called over, spoke to calmly and then made to very loudly say sorry to him. no more hassle all game.
Please note: prior to hitting the post button, I've double checked for anything that could be construed as "Anti Semitic" and to the best of my knowledge it isn't. Anything deemed to be of a Xenophobic nature is therefore purely accidental or down to your own misconstruing.
Why are parents so aggressive when watching their child play? on 08:40 - Sep 26 by artsbossbeard
There's some FA protocol required for this rather than just shouting back at the perpetrator and antagonising things further.
All FA Chartered Clubs "should" make parents sign a Parents Charter each season, which commits said parents to an acceptable standard of spectating and encourages positive voices from the sidelines, breaches of this are supposed to be fed back to your club officials at the game, so that they can advise the guilty parents accordingly.
Yes, it all sounds ultra PC and it's difficult in the spur of the moment but that's the FA guideline on such matters and this can all be backed up by a ref's report & club officials' statements, if necessary. Don't forget that the Respect campaign is still very much alive.
Here's one for you, my U14's have been drawn in a cup match against a team that we regularly spank heavily - I get no enjoyment out of this by the way, it's just that there's such a gulf between the boys. The upshot is that should we win this game, the draw pits us against one of the top teams in the region and some of my lads are talking about taking a tactical loss and concentrating on the league, so that they avoid this game but I can't do this.
Not because I don't want to lose a game of football, I simply couldn't contemplate the team that we beat regularly coming up against this team, it would be a car crash. We'll take one on the chin and maybe learn something whilst we're at it. Maybe.
Yes, you are right artsbossbeard. Our representatives, at the game, did have to mention to their parents about another issue and got referred to as 'job-worths and you with those badges make the situation even worse!' They spoke to their manager after the game about both issues, but really it's an U13 game, not the World Cup Final!!!
I do have to say I didn't raise my voice once, just spoke normally, just don't think he liked the fact I had the cheek to challenge him - not challenge, address him. Thought I'd get a rational reply back if he engaged his brain first......how wrong I was!!! Funny once he left, the rest of their parents were very friendly and chatty.
Just reminded me of that saying: 'Empty vessels make the most noise!' Pretty much summed up that situation for me perfectly.
Well I've not noticed any of that yet with my boys team, other than certain dads bellowing instructions when I think perhaps that is best left to the coach. But we are talking Kesgrave so it's all very middle class.
I don't think it's just a football thing these days - so many adults don't seem to have a filter when talking to or around children. Now we have a generation growing up that struggles to communicate without reliance on foul language and aggression. Sad.
As for my stint as lino, it was mostly painless. I flagged the wrong way once for a throw in, not because I didn't know who last touched the ball I just got my directions mixed up duh. Everyone knew whose it was so my signal was ignored.
At one point the ref called an offside that I didn't flag for, because I genuinely didn't think it was (and had a better view than he did!) - he was aware it was my first time and probably thought I just didn't spot it, which was slightly humiliating. A parent behind me commented "to be fair that was extremely tight, I'm not sure" which was reassuring.
Why are parents so aggressive when watching their child play? on 10:14 - Sep 26 by hype313
The sooner we educate our children to respect the authority in sport like we do in Rugby the better IMO.
Quality refereeing, clear and decisive with his decisions and look at the respect from the players, just won't accept any nonsense. The only football referee I can remember that had that respect and was that effective was Colina the Italian referee, although I am sure there must be others out there?
Why are parents so aggressive when watching their child play? on 10:37 - Sep 26 by artsbossbeard
We have young lads normally ref our games and they really don't have the kahuna's to tell the boys off.
I had one of my parents ref a game recently as the ref called off ill at the last minute and he was brilliant, the oppo manager asked if he'd ref their games going forward. He'd never reffed before either.
The first lad who questioned his decision with arms raised and an "oh my God!!", was called over, spoke to calmly and then made to very loudly say sorry to him. no more hassle all game.
The same is true in mens football. So much so that our association (AFA) have introduced a sin bin for dissent. 3 games in and it feels like a big step in the right direction.
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Why are parents so aggressive when watching their child play? on 11:21 - Sep 26 with 3566 views
Why are parents so aggressive when watching their child play? on 08:40 - Sep 26 by artsbossbeard
There's some FA protocol required for this rather than just shouting back at the perpetrator and antagonising things further.
All FA Chartered Clubs "should" make parents sign a Parents Charter each season, which commits said parents to an acceptable standard of spectating and encourages positive voices from the sidelines, breaches of this are supposed to be fed back to your club officials at the game, so that they can advise the guilty parents accordingly.
Yes, it all sounds ultra PC and it's difficult in the spur of the moment but that's the FA guideline on such matters and this can all be backed up by a ref's report & club officials' statements, if necessary. Don't forget that the Respect campaign is still very much alive.
Here's one for you, my U14's have been drawn in a cup match against a team that we regularly spank heavily - I get no enjoyment out of this by the way, it's just that there's such a gulf between the boys. The upshot is that should we win this game, the draw pits us against one of the top teams in the region and some of my lads are talking about taking a tactical loss and concentrating on the league, so that they avoid this game but I can't do this.
Not because I don't want to lose a game of football, I simply couldn't contemplate the team that we beat regularly coming up against this team, it would be a car crash. We'll take one on the chin and maybe learn something whilst we're at it. Maybe.
Maybe you should explain to them that deliberately losing a game goes against everything that makes sport, and football, great. Are they really that scared of losing?
They should give it their best shot because that's the whole point of playing football, not because of some weird sympathy to the sh1t team.
'Concentrating on the league'. They're u14's FFS. Professional football has a lot to answer for.
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Why are parents so aggressive when watching their child play? on 11:31 - Sep 26 with 3556 views
I think those nutters are the tip of the iceberg that is people nowadays taking sport (amateur and professional, for kids and adults) way too seriously.
Sport in its essence should be about respect and friendly, healthy competition. And fun/entertainment. Too many people are making it all about winning and squeezing the life out of the sport.
Pronouns: He/Him
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Why are parents so aggressive when watching their child play? on 11:49 - Sep 26 with 3516 views
Why are parents so aggressive when watching their child play? on 11:21 - Sep 26 by m14_blue
Maybe you should explain to them that deliberately losing a game goes against everything that makes sport, and football, great. Are they really that scared of losing?
They should give it their best shot because that's the whole point of playing football, not because of some weird sympathy to the sh1t team.
'Concentrating on the league'. They're u14's FFS. Professional football has a lot to answer for.
Just kids being kids and blurting out the first thing that comes into their head. I laughed.
However, I do feel some sympathy. The coach is a decent chap, the kids all play with a smile on their faces and they would get a hammering. We'll get a hammering.
Please note: prior to hitting the post button, I've double checked for anything that could be construed as "Anti Semitic" and to the best of my knowledge it isn't. Anything deemed to be of a Xenophobic nature is therefore purely accidental or down to your own misconstruing.
Why are parents so aggressive when watching their child play? on 11:49 - Sep 26 by artsbossbeard
Just kids being kids and blurting out the first thing that comes into their head. I laughed.
However, I do feel some sympathy. The coach is a decent chap, the kids all play with a smile on their faces and they would get a hammering. We'll get a hammering.
Fair enough, it's the nature of things at that age group I guess.
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Why are parents so aggressive when watching their child play? on 12:26 - Sep 26 with 3442 views
Why are parents so aggressive when watching their child play? on 08:40 - Sep 26 by artsbossbeard
There's some FA protocol required for this rather than just shouting back at the perpetrator and antagonising things further.
All FA Chartered Clubs "should" make parents sign a Parents Charter each season, which commits said parents to an acceptable standard of spectating and encourages positive voices from the sidelines, breaches of this are supposed to be fed back to your club officials at the game, so that they can advise the guilty parents accordingly.
Yes, it all sounds ultra PC and it's difficult in the spur of the moment but that's the FA guideline on such matters and this can all be backed up by a ref's report & club officials' statements, if necessary. Don't forget that the Respect campaign is still very much alive.
Here's one for you, my U14's have been drawn in a cup match against a team that we regularly spank heavily - I get no enjoyment out of this by the way, it's just that there's such a gulf between the boys. The upshot is that should we win this game, the draw pits us against one of the top teams in the region and some of my lads are talking about taking a tactical loss and concentrating on the league, so that they avoid this game but I can't do this.
Not because I don't want to lose a game of football, I simply couldn't contemplate the team that we beat regularly coming up against this team, it would be a car crash. We'll take one on the chin and maybe learn something whilst we're at it. Maybe.
"Ultra PC"!! Now this is PCness I do agree with. Stupid tw@ts!!!
I manage an under 12 girls team and must say have not seen anything bad from any parents over the last 2 years. It may be because they are girls but its still very competitive and some of my mums are quite loud and vocal but only in their encouragement for the girls to do well.
Won our first game last week for 12 months and the girls went crazy at the end to the point I thought about telling them to reign it in a bit but then thought no let them enjoy the moment. It was the first game the other team had ever lost and some were quite upset but part of the game is learning how to lose which we are quite adapt to now and makes a win all the more sweet. Once they all calmed down we done the usual respect handshake.
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