| The Warky Report: Middlesbrough (a) 21:07 - Dec 9 with 3379 views | Warkystache |
I was going on a walk today. Up at 6.30am, quick shower, made a cuppa, sat drinking it, looked for my keys to get down to Tel's for a paper, fags and our weekly bet, and my dad rang.
"Hello mate" said the chipper voice down the other end. "Listen, your mum's out all day with your aunt in London, getting decorations and what have you. I've been meaning to get her Christmas present this weekend, 'cos we're away next weekend and you know what the weekend after'll be like (short pause to let me imagine it). Fancy joining me? I'm going to Melford, Lavenham, possibly Clare if we get time, and then Sudbury 'cos she wants some flowers and I need a bottle of plonk". He had that brittle insouciance in his voice that said 'I'm fully prepared for you to say no, but I'd love it to be a yes'. What could I say? Anyway, I said yes.
He came over at 9.30am and helped himself to a cuppa as I changed into less scruffy clothing. We chatted about my mum and her present. "Something antique I think" he said vaguely. That explained our journey.
He drove us in his car. We chatted about my job, his voluntary work, his thoughts on ITFC, my hopes that we were turning a corner following two morale-boosting wins. He doesn't really get down to PR often. He's busy doing other stuff. He's happy. I guess that's what counts. He retired at 59 after 40 years in Government service in London. His pension is nearly twice my annual salary. He doesn't rub it in though. He's my dad.
We got to Long Melford and spent 10 minutes looking for somewhere to park on the hectic high street. We ended up parking near The Bull Hotel, dad edging into a gap between an immaculate Range Rover and a well-used Fiesta. It was bright but freezing. He cupped his hands around his mouth and blew as he got out. "Fancy a cuppa?" he asked. "Yep" I said, and we headed for one of the upmarket caffs.
He ended up having a bacon sandwich as well. He was peckish. "Your mum left at six this morning. Meeting your aunt at Colchester station. They'll be there by now I should think. Going to Covent Garden and then on to Fortnums. I didn't have time for breakfast" apologetically, glancing at the sandwich he was enjoying. I sipped my tea, stomach churning from the drink I'd consumed the night before, refusing all food until my equilibrium righted. He drinks little these days. He's happy with tea, although he's partial to the odd ginger beer as well.
He finished, little 'oohs' of satisfaction as he wiped stray crumbs from his mouth with a paper napkin. He swallowed the last of his tea and drained the dregs from the pot, added a dash of milk and gulped that too. I paid and we headed out into the freeze, coats buttoned, eyes watery. Antiques ahoy.
The first shop was full of promise. Well, I say 'promise'; it seemed to be for him. I just thought it was a load of old tat, cleaned up a bit and bunged on display for £50 more than it was worth. He looked at pendants in glass cases and pottery and brooches and threadbare teddies with loose limbs and glassy stares (and no fur). I looked at old books on warfare and country pursuits, yellowed pages and lectures on Maginot Lines and tickling trout. All the other punters looked about 60, couples; him in a leather coat and grey scarf tied carelessly and black jeans, her in faux fur hat and plum-coloured coat, one gloved hand in the crook of his arm signifying ownership. A couple pushing his mum in a wheelchair, the wife nattering in a sing-song voice, calling everything 'nice' and 'lovely'. The old girl in the chair, mute, miserable-looking, dragged literally against her will into a musty-smelling antique shop to look at things she probably chucked out in her younger days, when she could have been home, warm, doing her racing selections for an afternoon in front of the telly. How the f*ck Lovejoy managed to get his oats so often in this trade was a mystery. Perhaps he had shares in Vaseline?
Dad found a little Royal Doulton piece, priced at £85, and cooed over it. I suggested we try elsewhere. He put it back, reluctantly, but then found something else. A figurine of a ballet dancer, one leg so badly chipped that she resembled Heather Mills pre-op. It was £35. I feared him making it worse when he put it back on the shelf, so we'd end up having to buy it (the legend "We have full CCTV" barked from every wall). "Mmm" he said. I silently apologised to my mum for Xmas day. She'd get half a figurine and a jigsaw puzzle in one pressie.
We thankfully left without a purchase. "Never mind" said Dad, with fortitude. The next shop was freezing inside and the owner sat at a till in the front, three bar heater at his feet, suspicious look on his face. His wares were mainly the sort of ornaments you see at your Grandma's; Hummel figures of German kids in lederhosen holding posies or up trees. Disney rip-off's of Bambi. Bloody awful glass bowls in virulent oranges and mauves. We didn't stay there long.
He went back to the first shop and bought the Doulton, the owner knocking a tenner off, possibly in sheer amazement at it selling. He even wrapped it in tissue paper. Dad set back to the car, jauntily. "I knew we'd find something" he said, happily. We went to Lavenham.
Lavenham was full of the same types as Melford. Except we were here at lunchtime, and families sat eating in expensive restaurants, father laughing at his own jokes, dressed like Mr Toad, mother fresh from the salon, kids sat mute, half-full glasses of Coke with a droopy straw in them at their elbows, heads bent texting someone, anyone. I had a ciggie while my dad went in a shop that sold Steiff toys. He came out with a tiny bear, stud in ear, fluffy fur, £60. "She likes Steiff" he said, seeing me looking. I smiled and congratulated him. He smiled back, pleased.
A final antique shop and then we left. He didn't find anything in it worth buying. It smelt as well. Perhaps that's the appeal? In the car as we headed for Sudbury, he told me that he'd wanted to get mum a new eternity ring as hers was too thin to wear. He thought she should be with him when he bought it, like she was in 1969 when he bought her the first one. My cynicism melted like a Chocolate Button in a warm hand.
We stopped for a drink on the way home and I noticed we were losing 2-0 on the pub telly. Dad had a small red wine, I had a pint of Landlord. He said thanks for joining him and I said thanks for inviting me. We both meant it. Then Jeff Stelling said "Ipswich's recent good run comes to an end; they've lost 2-0" and Dad said "Unlucky mate, still they'll win next Saturday" like he used to do when I was a kid and we'd seen them lose at PR, and I remembered, and I was glad.
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| on 22:19 - Dec 9 with 3275 views | _ |
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| The Warky Report: Middlesbrough (a) on 22:56 - Dec 9 with 3247 views | Steve_M |
A lovely little vignette of life. Between this, Newcy's post and Sitter's and Healey's newborns it's been a good day on TWTD despite the result. |  |
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| The Warky Report: Middlesbrough (a) on 22:58 - Dec 9 with 3245 views | StochesStotasBlewe |
Fabulous. ......"Still, they,ll win next Saturday", that,s what my dear old Dad used to say to me.
These "match reports"are the highlight of TWTD. |  |
| We have no village green, or a shop.
It's very, very quiet.
I can walk to the pub. |
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| The Warky Report: Middlesbrough (a) on 23:53 - Dec 9 with 3200 views | Warkystache |
| The Warky Report: Middlesbrough (a) on 22:58 - Dec 9 by StochesStotasBlewe |
Fabulous. ......"Still, they,ll win next Saturday", that,s what my dear old Dad used to say to me.
These "match reports"are the highlight of TWTD. |
Thanks all - good to know they're appreciated somewhere! | |
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| The Warky Report: Middlesbrough (a) on 02:03 - Dec 10 with 3125 views | Swansea_Blue |
Nice one. I made it to the end and enjoyed it, unlike the 'real' match reports. A good finish. Quite partial to a quaff of Timothy Taylor myself. |  |
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| The Warky Report: Middlesbrough (a) on 07:06 - Dec 10 with 3039 views | TractorWood |
Perfectly captures the essence of places like Melford and Lavenham as I know too well from National Trust visits. |  |
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| The Warky Report: Middlesbrough (a) on 07:44 - Dec 10 with 3024 views | m14_blue |
| The Warky Report: Middlesbrough (a) on 23:53 - Dec 9 by Warkystache |
Thanks all - good to know they're appreciated somewhere! |
They're superb.
You should collate them into a book. | | | |
| The Warky Report: Middlesbrough (a) on 17:12 - Dec 10 with 2836 views | J2BLUE |
I love your addition of new characters. I always think FFS when Terry isn't in one of the leading roles and yet it still works brilliantly. Your writing style is brilliant. I love the little details and your observations. Have you ever played poker? |  |
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| The Warky Report: Middlesbrough (a) on 17:14 - Dec 10 with 2831 views | The_Romford_Blue |
| The Warky Report: Middlesbrough (a) on 17:12 - Dec 10 by J2BLUE |
I love your addition of new characters. I always think FFS when Terry isn't in one of the leading roles and yet it still works brilliantly. Your writing style is brilliant. I love the little details and your observations. Have you ever played poker? |
How many times does he have to tell you J2? He doesn't want to play strip poker with you. |  |
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| The Warky Report: Middlesbrough (a) on 17:15 - Dec 10 with 2831 views | NewcyBlue |
Warky report is a must read for me! |  |
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| The Warky Report: Middlesbrough (a) on 17:23 - Dec 10 with 2813 views | J2BLUE |
| The Warky Report: Middlesbrough (a) on 17:14 - Dec 10 by The_Romford_Blue |
How many times does he have to tell you J2? He doesn't want to play strip poker with you. |
Why not, you always do? | |
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| The Warky Report: Middlesbrough (a) on 17:24 - Dec 10 with 2807 views | The_Romford_Blue |
| The Warky Report: Middlesbrough (a) on 17:23 - Dec 10 by J2BLUE |
Why not, you always do? |
We agreed you wouldn't tell anyone??? | |
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| The Warky Report: Middlesbrough (a) on 20:33 - Dec 10 with 2726 views | CooperBurleyMills |
| The Warky Report: Middlesbrough (a) on 17:24 - Dec 10 by The_Romford_Blue |
We agreed you wouldn't tell anyone??? |
Lovely day out it seems! Save for the actual result ... | | | |
| The Warky Report: Middlesbrough (a) on 09:34 - Dec 11 with 2591 views | bluewein |
"He retired at 59 after 40 years in Government service in London. His pension is nearly twice my annual salary. He doesn't rub it in though. He's my dad."
Facters is your Dad and I claim the £5.
Great read as always. |  |
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