| I've just been mugged. 10:35 - Feb 24 with 3248 views | Lord_Lucan |
The wifes birthday present has just been delivered and I was about to plumb it in and the delivery man said “Do you want me to sort it out?” I said “That would be great” handed him a fiver and went to the garage to get my socket set for him. By the time it took me to get to the garage and back (about one minute) he had gone. Apparently “Sorting it out” means taking the packaging away.
This country!
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| I've just been mugged. on 10:36 - Feb 24 with 3208 views | monytowbray |
You sure he wasn't up in the bedroom with your wife and said "sort her out"? |  |
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| I've just been mugged. on 10:37 - Feb 24 with 3194 views | WeWereZombies |
Are you sure he has not just gone to his van to get his socket set? |  |
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| I've just been mugged. on 10:39 - Feb 24 with 3178 views | J2BLUE |
Did you buy her an oven? |  |
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| I've just been mugged. on 10:39 - Feb 24 with 3172 views | Pecker |
You brought your Wife a Birthday present that needs plumbing in? What did you buy her? If I brought my Wife a Birthday present that needed plumbing in, I wouldn't be her Husband for much longer. |  | | |
| I've just been mugged. on 10:42 - Feb 24 with 3138 views | artsbossbeard |
| I've just been mugged. on 10:39 - Feb 24 by Pecker |
You brought your Wife a Birthday present that needs plumbing in? What did you buy her? If I brought my Wife a Birthday present that needed plumbing in, I wouldn't be her Husband for much longer. |
There's a plan here. |  |
| Please note: prior to hitting the post button, I've double checked for anything that could be construed as "Anti Semitic" and to the best of my knowledge it isn't. Anything deemed to be of a Xenophobic nature is therefore purely accidental or down to your own misconstruing. | | Poll: | Raining in IP8 - shall I get the washing in? |
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| I've just been mugged. on 10:45 - Feb 24 with 3127 views | Dyland |
Equally shocking is that you thought a fiver was cool. What are you, like 85 or something?
:) |  |
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| I've just been mugged. on 10:46 - Feb 24 with 3085 views | WeWereZombies |
| I've just been mugged. on 10:39 - Feb 24 by Pecker |
You brought your Wife a Birthday present that needs plumbing in? What did you buy her? If I brought my Wife a Birthday present that needed plumbing in, I wouldn't be her Husband for much longer. |
Your wife would leave you if you bought her a jacuzzi for her exclusive use? | |
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| I've just been mugged. on 10:50 - Feb 24 with 3057 views | Half_Idiot |
| I've just been mugged. on 10:46 - Feb 24 by WeWereZombies |
Your wife would leave you if you bought her a jacuzzi for her exclusive use? |
I'd be surprised if one man could take off with a jacuzzi in under a minute |  | | |
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| I've just been mugged. on 10:52 - Feb 24 with 3057 views | Lord_Lucan |
| I've just been mugged. on 10:45 - Feb 24 by Dyland |
Equally shocking is that you thought a fiver was cool. What are you, like 85 or something?
:) |
To be fair it's a piece of p1ss to plumb a washing machine in and I think my remuneration was sufficient (overly sufficient as it turned out) - and in anycase, wifey looked at me like I was a madman when I gave him a fiver as she didn't think for a minute he was going to do anything but take away the polystyrene anyway.
Looks like I completely misunderstood the situation. | |
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| lols on 10:55 - Feb 24 with 3033 views | Dyland |
| I've just been mugged. on 10:52 - Feb 24 by Lord_Lucan |
To be fair it's a piece of p1ss to plumb a washing machine in and I think my remuneration was sufficient (overly sufficient as it turned out) - and in anycase, wifey looked at me like I was a madman when I gave him a fiver as she didn't think for a minute he was going to do anything but take away the polystyrene anyway.
Looks like I completely misunderstood the situation. |
Totes ;)
Obviously where to begin with killing two birds with one stone buying a new washing machine as the wife's birthday present. Classic stuff Lucers. | |
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| I've just been mugged. on 10:55 - Feb 24 with 3033 views | Pecker |
| I've just been mugged. on 10:52 - Feb 24 by Lord_Lucan |
To be fair it's a piece of p1ss to plumb a washing machine in and I think my remuneration was sufficient (overly sufficient as it turned out) - and in anycase, wifey looked at me like I was a madman when I gave him a fiver as she didn't think for a minute he was going to do anything but take away the polystyrene anyway.
Looks like I completely misunderstood the situation. |
You brought your Wife a washing machine for her BIRTHDAY? You are one brave b@$t@rd. | | | |
| I've just been mugged. on 11:05 - Feb 24 with 2970 views | m14_blue |
| I've just been mugged. on 10:39 - Feb 24 by J2BLUE |
Did you buy her an oven? |
You plumb in your oven?
I know cooking's not necessarily your forte but even so........ | | | |
| I've just been mugged. on 11:10 - Feb 24 with 2943 views | NthQldITFC |
| I've just been mugged. on 10:55 - Feb 24 by Pecker |
You brought your Wife a washing machine for her BIRTHDAY? You are one brave b@$t@rd. |
I bought my mum a deep fat fryer for her birthday when I was 15 or so. Amused not was she, but Pater thought it was hilarious. |  |
| # WE ARE STEALING THE FUTURE FROM OUR CHILDREN --- WE MUST CHANGE COURSE # | | Poll: | It's driving me nuts |
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| I've just been mugged. on 11:11 - Feb 24 with 2931 views | Pecker |
| I've just been mugged. on 10:46 - Feb 24 by WeWereZombies |
Your wife would leave you if you bought her a jacuzzi for her exclusive use? |
Yes. | | | |
| I've just been mugged. on 11:13 - Feb 24 with 2924 views | artsbossbeard |
| I've just been mugged. on 11:10 - Feb 24 by NthQldITFC |
I bought my mum a deep fat fryer for her birthday when I was 15 or so. Amused not was she, but Pater thought it was hilarious. |
My mate's younger brother got his mum and ironing board for Christmas. And wrapped it.
It looked like a wrapped ironing board. | |
| Please note: prior to hitting the post button, I've double checked for anything that could be construed as "Anti Semitic" and to the best of my knowledge it isn't. Anything deemed to be of a Xenophobic nature is therefore purely accidental or down to your own misconstruing. | | Poll: | Raining in IP8 - shall I get the washing in? |
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| I've just been mugged. on 11:15 - Feb 24 with 2910 views | Pecker |
| I've just been mugged. on 10:39 - Feb 24 by J2BLUE |
Did you buy her an oven? |
This is why people do not listen to your culinary advice. "Did you buy her an oven?" Classic. Thank you for cheering up my Monday. | | | |
| I've just been mugged. on 11:21 - Feb 24 with 2874 views | Dyland |
| I've just been mugged. on 10:39 - Feb 24 by J2BLUE |
Did you buy her an oven? |
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| lols on 11:37 - Feb 24 with 2788 views | Lord_Lucan |
| lols on 10:55 - Feb 24 by Dyland |
Totes ;)
Obviously where to begin with killing two birds with one stone buying a new washing machine as the wife's birthday present. Classic stuff Lucers. |
To be fair I'm not that daft to buy her a washing machine for her birthday and it was said 90% in jest.
However - even though it wasn't strictly a birthday present it has subconsciously allowed me to not purchase a present of significant value in a weeks time. | |
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| I've just been mugged. on 11:37 - Feb 24 with 2792 views | GlasgowBlue |
I once lived with a girl when I was 18. I bought her a Hoover from Rumbalows for her Birthday.
She moved out not long after. |  |
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| I've just been mugged. on 11:40 - Feb 24 with 2762 views | GlasgowBlue |
| I've just been mugged. on 10:45 - Feb 24 by Dyland |
Equally shocking is that you thought a fiver was cool. What are you, like 85 or something?
:) |
A dog goes into a hardware store and says: “I’d like a job please”. The hardware store owner says: “We don’t hire dogs, why don’t you go join the circus?” To which the dog replied: “What would the circus want with a plumber?”. | |
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| I've just been mugged. on 11:42 - Feb 24 with 2743 views | Lord_Lucan |
| I've just been mugged. on 11:40 - Feb 24 by GlasgowBlue |
A dog goes into a hardware store and says: “I’d like a job please”. The hardware store owner says: “We don’t hire dogs, why don’t you go join the circus?” To which the dog replied: “What would the circus want with a plumber?”. |
Glassers
I thought you learnt your joke telling lesson last week. | |
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| I've just been mugged. on 11:44 - Feb 24 with 2721 views | Meadowlark |
| I've just been mugged. on 11:37 - Feb 24 by GlasgowBlue |
I once lived with a girl when I was 18. I bought her a Hoover from Rumbalows for her Birthday.
She moved out not long after. |
When I used to work away a lot, Mrs Lark said I never brought her a present home. So the next time I bought her a bag and a belt.
Hoover worked perfectly after that! |  | | |
| lols on 11:45 - Feb 24 with 2710 views | Pecker |
| lols on 11:37 - Feb 24 by Lord_Lucan |
To be fair I'm not that daft to buy her a washing machine for her birthday and it was said 90% in jest.
However - even though it wasn't strictly a birthday present it has subconsciously allowed me to not purchase a present of significant value in a weeks time. |
You brought your Wife a washing machine for her Birthday, didn't you? | | | |
| I've just been mugged. on 12:59 - Feb 24 with 2536 views | itfcjoe |
| I've just been mugged. on 11:05 - Feb 24 by m14_blue |
You plumb in your oven?
I know cooking's not necessarily your forte but even so........ |
never heard of a steam oven, you heathen |  |
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