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Dreary fantasy career swap 12:00 - Feb 20 with 1804 viewsfooters

Lots of serious discussion at the mo so how about we lighten things up :)

When you really can't be arsed to go to work, what alternative professions catch your imagination?

Always liked the look of being a postie or milkman. Don't really have to talk to anyone, nice long walk and fresh air every day, get done early afternoon time, bit of 70s 'ow's yer father with the local readers' wives...

And a train driver too. Looks like it'd be a larf but then most mornings our train drivers look miserable as sin! Maybe it's because they only pootle along at a snail's pace and aren't allowed to put their foot down :)

Obviously unrealistic jobs like being Ron Jeremy or beer taster for Adnams don't really count.


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Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:08 - Feb 20 with 1156 viewsOhDavidMcgoldrick

If salary wasn't a consideration I would work in either a 999 hot desk or police forensics.

Always interested me being in one of the adrenaline pumped public service roles but I don't fancy the aggression that front line police have to face.

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Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:08 - Feb 20 with 1150 viewsPaul_Knows

No idea why, but a translator. Been trying to learn German the past 6 months, so something along those lines would be decent.

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Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:09 - Feb 20 with 1144 viewsusm

Lorry Driver.

Dont know why but its always appealed to me, not yer Sainsburys driver but the long distance stuff. Maybe its because I like the cr@p food that service stations dish up.

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Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:11 - Feb 20 with 1135 viewsLord_Lucan

You would have a problem being a train driver as it's pretty much a closed shop and Ernie the milkman is pretty much finished.

I have been lucky enough to have enjoyed a varied fun filled life and for a stress free do what you want where you want thing I was very happy when I was a pedlar - but it wasn't much fun in the winter.

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Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:13 - Feb 20 with 1129 viewsBackToRussia

One of these wildlife wardens. As far as I can tell there's no actual work beyond staring heroically into the distance at a bird, and you get to live in a house in the middle of nowhere about 20 miles away from people. Perfect.

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Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:15 - Feb 20 with 1123 viewsleitrimblue

Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:09 - Feb 20 by usm

Lorry Driver.

Dont know why but its always appealed to me, not yer Sainsburys driver but the long distance stuff. Maybe its because I like the cr@p food that service stations dish up.


I think long distance trucker would be pretty cool. A life of fry ups an Yorkies. I was a big fan of the classic movie convoy as a kid..
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Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:18 - Feb 20 with 1105 viewsitfcjoe

I wish I knew what I know now when I was 16/17 and had more career focussed parents who were able to help and advise me more on how to get a better career.

They weren't able to, because they didn't know - so no blame attached, and their attitude is you should always be working - better to be pushing a broom around a street for minimum wage rather than study further or take time to try and change careers etc.

Hopefully my children will be able to benefit from my experiences in this manner

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Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:19 - Feb 20 with 1087 viewsfooters

Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:11 - Feb 20 by Lord_Lucan

You would have a problem being a train driver as it's pretty much a closed shop and Ernie the milkman is pretty much finished.

I have been lucky enough to have enjoyed a varied fun filled life and for a stress free do what you want where you want thing I was very happy when I was a pedlar - but it wasn't much fun in the winter.


You know, I thought the days of Ernie were numbered too, but I have noticed quite a few still going, even here in Londonistan. And with people being more eco/local conscious I reckon the dear old milkman could be due a big comeback!

As for the train driver thing, I'm not too fussed. These modern diesel/electric trains look a lot less fun to drive than a precious steam loco.

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Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:26 - Feb 20 with 1062 viewsJ2BLUE

Postman, baker, investment banker and, you'll laugh at this, until recently, an MEP. I'd love to go into politics and MP is a bit too under the spotlight.

And some sort of trade where you work for yourself with a decent level of skill doing something like plumbing.

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Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:28 - Feb 20 with 1053 viewsfooters

Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:26 - Feb 20 by J2BLUE

Postman, baker, investment banker and, you'll laugh at this, until recently, an MEP. I'd love to go into politics and MP is a bit too under the spotlight.

And some sort of trade where you work for yourself with a decent level of skill doing something like plumbing.


A baker?! J2, please, please do not consider this as a viable career option.

But good to see we'll one day be poking all manner of things through people's slots together :)

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Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:29 - Feb 20 with 1051 viewsOhDavidMcgoldrick

Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:18 - Feb 20 by itfcjoe

I wish I knew what I know now when I was 16/17 and had more career focussed parents who were able to help and advise me more on how to get a better career.

They weren't able to, because they didn't know - so no blame attached, and their attitude is you should always be working - better to be pushing a broom around a street for minimum wage rather than study further or take time to try and change careers etc.

Hopefully my children will be able to benefit from my experiences in this manner


My experience was very much the opposite (in terms of trying to guide me away from actually getting in job), doing my A-Levels in 2009 all of the teachers were hell bent on pushing further education and university regardless of what your interests were or what course they proposed you do. (Probably for their stats)

I became sick of it and fortunately myself and a small group of friends all broke from the norm and went into jobs that offered part-time education in a full time-work environment.

10 years on and so many of other friends/former students have pointless degrees which their profession has no use for, except now loaded up with student debt.

So I very much agree on the career focus, even if this dosent necessarily require further education.
[Post edited 20 Feb 12:30]

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Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:31 - Feb 20 with 1040 viewsfooters

Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:18 - Feb 20 by itfcjoe

I wish I knew what I know now when I was 16/17 and had more career focussed parents who were able to help and advise me more on how to get a better career.

They weren't able to, because they didn't know - so no blame attached, and their attitude is you should always be working - better to be pushing a broom around a street for minimum wage rather than study further or take time to try and change careers etc.

Hopefully my children will be able to benefit from my experiences in this manner


It's always a difficult one that. My parents didn't really know what to do with me... When they found out I needed glasses my dad insisted I should become a sparky... Trust me when I say I'm the last person you'd want wiring up your gaff.

On the other hand, it's better to have parents who just say 'go for what you want' instead of those who try and force their career successes on their children. As an example, my uncle packed my cousin off to do a business degree in the hope that he'd be his successor. It made him miserable and my uncle retired last year, so what a stupid waste that was!

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Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:35 - Feb 20 with 1014 viewsDefault_User

Gynecologist!

I love to shag cups.
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Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:40 - Feb 20 with 1002 viewsitfcjoe

Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:31 - Feb 20 by footers

It's always a difficult one that. My parents didn't really know what to do with me... When they found out I needed glasses my dad insisted I should become a sparky... Trust me when I say I'm the last person you'd want wiring up your gaff.

On the other hand, it's better to have parents who just say 'go for what you want' instead of those who try and force their career successes on their children. As an example, my uncle packed my cousin off to do a business degree in the hope that he'd be his successor. It made him miserable and my uncle retired last year, so what a stupid waste that was!


It's probably a product of time as well, I'm not old but the world was a much smaller place at the turn of the mIllenium when I finished school, and I was a different person too.

Ironically I have now ended back up in the family business, which is the last thing either of us probably wanted or expected - I was expected to do more, and went off to university as the first member in my family to do so and now work for my Dad who left school at 15. Funny how things come together

I'd have loved to have been in the Foreign Office, or something like that, but back when I went to uni to do Maths the height of my ambition was a 'good office job'. I may as well have tired to get into sport or something I enjoyed more

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Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:45 - Feb 20 with 980 viewsHalf_Idiot

I'd love to work in a record shop. Just sitting there all day listening to music and chatting to the regulars about new music, old rare records, etc... That's the dream!
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Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:49 - Feb 20 with 965 viewsDarth_Koont

Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:08 - Feb 20 by OhDavidMcgoldrick

If salary wasn't a consideration I would work in either a 999 hot desk or police forensics.

Always interested me being in one of the adrenaline pumped public service roles but I don't fancy the aggression that front line police have to face.


I don't think police forensics is all that exciting by the sound of it. Just this week, I was speaking to an ex-forensic guy as part of a work project and it seems increasingly mechanical and frustrating - at least it was for this guy. You just take the obvious clues to build the case and move on.

Don't think it's anything like the TV or film version where amazing clues are being found.
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Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:52 - Feb 20 with 935 viewsOhDavidMcgoldrick

Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:49 - Feb 20 by Darth_Koont

I don't think police forensics is all that exciting by the sound of it. Just this week, I was speaking to an ex-forensic guy as part of a work project and it seems increasingly mechanical and frustrating - at least it was for this guy. You just take the obvious clues to build the case and move on.

Don't think it's anything like the TV or film version where amazing clues are being found.


You are probably right,

I am too sucked into the Line of Duty style world where the blood stained footprint was formed by a shoe that only the lead detective's son wears.....

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Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:52 - Feb 20 with 933 viewsDanTheMan

Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:26 - Feb 20 by J2BLUE

Postman, baker, investment banker and, you'll laugh at this, until recently, an MEP. I'd love to go into politics and MP is a bit too under the spotlight.

And some sort of trade where you work for yourself with a decent level of skill doing something like plumbing.


You'll be happy to know J2 that investments are about to get opened up to the high street consumer in a big way.

As for me, I think a gardener.

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Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:54 - Feb 20 with 923 viewsDubtractor

Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:13 - Feb 20 by BackToRussia

One of these wildlife wardens. As far as I can tell there's no actual work beyond staring heroically into the distance at a bird, and you get to live in a house in the middle of nowhere about 20 miles away from people. Perfect.


Something like this. Or being in charge of the gardens of a stately home with a big walled veg garden.

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Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:56 - Feb 20 with 910 viewsfooters

Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:54 - Feb 20 by Dubtractor

Something like this. Or being in charge of the gardens of a stately home with a big walled veg garden.


Imagine this one, Dubbers!


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Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:58 - Feb 20 with 903 viewsPecker

Very similar my old fruit. Always fancied being a Postman. A train driver would be ok if you are on the faster trains, London - Cardiff for instance. Couldn't be a$$ed with those slow multi stop efforts. I am very lucky that I love my job, but would become a postie if the day ever arrived.
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Dreary fantasy career swap on 13:02 - Feb 20 with 888 viewsDubtractor

Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:56 - Feb 20 by footers

Imagine this one, Dubbers!



That's exactly the sort of thing that I'm thinking of.

I was born underwater, I dried out in the sun. I started humping volcanoes baby, when I was too young.
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Dreary fantasy career swap on 13:05 - Feb 20 with 881 viewsOldsmoker

I was v.good at Maths, Tech drawing and art so I thought Architect.
I was told by teachers to drop the art and take on Physics, Chemistry and Electronics.
I felt it was a bit of a punishment to drop art.
I went to uni to do Civil Engineering and struggled with the Physics and Fluid mechanics but excelled in Tech drawing and computer programming but ironically they were not part of the exam at the end of the year.
So I left after a year and by accident got on a TOPS computing course.
A 30 year long career in computer programming/system design was my reward.
I got lucky as all the advice had pushed me in the wrong directions.
I even used my love of art and skill at Tech drawing to create flow charts for new systems which got me a better paid job and a reputation that meant I got head-hunted for various FTSE100 companies.

However, the ones who succeeded the most were those with people skills who could grab the credit and deflect the blame while they brown-nosed their way up the corporate ladder.

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Dreary fantasy career swap on 13:06 - Feb 20 with 875 viewsDarth_Koont

Dreary fantasy career swap on 12:52 - Feb 20 by OhDavidMcgoldrick

You are probably right,

I am too sucked into the Line of Duty style world where the blood stained footprint was formed by a shoe that only the lead detective's son wears.....


But wait a minute! You're also sleeping with the lead detective!

To be fair, that would make Monday mornings more interesting.
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Dreary fantasy career swap on 13:10 - Feb 20 with 855 viewsIpswichKnight

I often joke with my wife that if we could chuck in the rat race we would set up a eco lodge in the highlands of Scotland and start a conservation project to re-introduce wild Lynx into the forests.

The dream job for me would be to become a wildlife cameraman/filmaker travelling the world watching animals is my dream!
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