| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone 18:51 - Jan 21 with 10005 views | Swailsey |
For seemingly no reason?
A fairly good friend (not amazing but reasonable, who I have known for 15 years) suddenly stopped replying to my messages and then when I asked if everything was ok, I was blocked on WhatsApp.
I honestly can’t think of any logical reason for this, and whilst it’s slightly upsetting, it’s also quite hard not to self-reflect to the point of insanity. Maybe they have something else going on in their life? Maybe they were overwhelmed? Are these legitimate reasons?
All very strange. [Post edited 21 Jan 18:52]
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| Who said: "Colin Healy made Cesc Fabregas look like Colin Healy"? | We miss you TLA |
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| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone on 12:08 - Jan 22 with 1632 views | VanSaParody |
Don't beat yourself up about it
Use the experience to write another song (not being flippant)
I know I only write parody lyrics, but there is still some therapy/solace to be found in that form of expression
COYB's! |  | | |
| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone on 12:16 - Jan 22 with 1599 views | Swailsey |
Again, this place is so so great! | |
| Who said: "Colin Healy made Cesc Fabregas look like Colin Healy"? | We miss you TLA |
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| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone on 12:25 - Jan 22 with 1578 views | CobboldCrusty |
Not the same thing at all but after a lot of umming and ahhing on both sides I got out of a long term relationship last year. Coping with the finality of it and now the absolute silence (beyond sorting out legacy WiFi payments) has been far harder to cope with than I had anticipated.
Reading some of the comments on here has been reassuring and comforting - if anyone has any advice on coping with shame, regret, feelings of grief though it would be really appreciated. [Post edited 22 Jan 12:32]
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| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone on 12:39 - Jan 22 with 1539 views | Reus30 |
I have been that person who ghosted my best friend and my close friendship group. Still sticks with you when I think about it as it's created my own isolation but I had my reasons and I made my choice.
Best pals since primary school, were inseparably even through ill health and relationships etc. Until we got to our late 20s and everything changed. I reflected on parts of our relationship and it became very one-sided. He was dishonest and his actions were something that I deemed as being a bad person, his other friends were also people I actively distained and the 'group' was becoming fractured due to different interests (me being boring and not wanting drugs basically).
We had what was to be a final dinner and drinks and I got home, blocked them all, removed all photos, texts everything. I grieved for a long time but I had to ignore them all until I moved away a few months after and I wanted to get away as far as possible. I have only been back once in the last 6 years just to visit family. I didn't use to miss them at the time as I know I was doing right but as I get older and friendships don't form as easily, you reflect a little differently.
I still think about it and whether I could have handled it differently and sad to watch 20 years of daily interaction down the toilet. I doubt they would be feeling too much pain though but I am only looking at it through my tinted viewpoint.
My advice is you reached out, leave it with them. |  | | |
| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone on 12:52 - Jan 22 with 1513 views | gsoly |
Felt quite hearted reading this thread, and hope you did too Swailsey. I think I've been on both sides of this - not the same extent - but have always realised it's an internal issue, and nothing the other (ignored) party has done. Life's hard, and sometimes you need a break from a section of it. Not everyone has the strength to navigate it by removing certain parts, rather than the whole thing. |  | | |
| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone on 12:55 - Jan 22 with 1500 views | Sikamikanico |
| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone on 12:39 - Jan 22 by Reus30 |
I have been that person who ghosted my best friend and my close friendship group. Still sticks with you when I think about it as it's created my own isolation but I had my reasons and I made my choice.
Best pals since primary school, were inseparably even through ill health and relationships etc. Until we got to our late 20s and everything changed. I reflected on parts of our relationship and it became very one-sided. He was dishonest and his actions were something that I deemed as being a bad person, his other friends were also people I actively distained and the 'group' was becoming fractured due to different interests (me being boring and not wanting drugs basically).
We had what was to be a final dinner and drinks and I got home, blocked them all, removed all photos, texts everything. I grieved for a long time but I had to ignore them all until I moved away a few months after and I wanted to get away as far as possible. I have only been back once in the last 6 years just to visit family. I didn't use to miss them at the time as I know I was doing right but as I get older and friendships don't form as easily, you reflect a little differently.
I still think about it and whether I could have handled it differently and sad to watch 20 years of daily interaction down the toilet. I doubt they would be feeling too much pain though but I am only looking at it through my tinted viewpoint.
My advice is you reached out, leave it with them. |
I ghosted a friend/acquaintance after realising our entire friendship was one-sided and how toxic he was.
Came to a head one day when he berated a woman behind the counter in greggs for not reheating his order even though they aren't allowed to.
Bumped into him last month and he was exactly the same person, very quick to anger |  | | |
| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone on 12:55 - Jan 22 with 1495 views | SE1blue |
| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone on 12:25 - Jan 22 by CobboldCrusty |
Not the same thing at all but after a lot of umming and ahhing on both sides I got out of a long term relationship last year. Coping with the finality of it and now the absolute silence (beyond sorting out legacy WiFi payments) has been far harder to cope with than I had anticipated.
Reading some of the comments on here has been reassuring and comforting - if anyone has any advice on coping with shame, regret, feelings of grief though it would be really appreciated. [Post edited 22 Jan 12:32]
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Honestly, choosing to end a relationship can be just as hard as being told one is ending.
I went through similar feelings as you when I had to end a very damaging relationship a long time ago. A close friend suggested I offload on a therapist and it’s still one of the best pieces of advice ever had.
They are completely detached and unbiased and it it might help you manage your feelings in a better/different way. Ask for a GP referral (if things are really difficult) or pay for a private one. Either way, they are totally worth the time and money. |  |
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| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone on 13:12 - Jan 22 with 1468 views | stonojnr |
| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone on 10:07 - Jan 22 by SaffronWaldenBlues |
It's called social media, it has turned people into social weirdos and I have had this happen with a few people. People were never like this back in the day, and I find "ghosting" by grown adults to be pretty childish behavior if done on purpose, and frankly rude. |
Nah it happened way before social media came along, some people just aren't the friends they pupport to be.
Move on accept it, never compromise your values to please other people | | | |
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| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone on 14:10 - Jan 22 with 1375 views | CobboldCrusty |
| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone on 12:55 - Jan 22 by SE1blue |
Honestly, choosing to end a relationship can be just as hard as being told one is ending.
I went through similar feelings as you when I had to end a very damaging relationship a long time ago. A close friend suggested I offload on a therapist and it’s still one of the best pieces of advice ever had.
They are completely detached and unbiased and it it might help you manage your feelings in a better/different way. Ask for a GP referral (if things are really difficult) or pay for a private one. Either way, they are totally worth the time and money. |
really appreciate this SE1 | | | |
| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone on 15:01 - Jan 22 with 1277 views | Swailsey |
| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone on 12:52 - Jan 22 by gsoly |
Felt quite hearted reading this thread, and hope you did too Swailsey. I think I've been on both sides of this - not the same extent - but have always realised it's an internal issue, and nothing the other (ignored) party has done. Life's hard, and sometimes you need a break from a section of it. Not everyone has the strength to navigate it by removing certain parts, rather than the whole thing. |
Indeed, really fascinating to see all of the viewpoints | |
| Who said: "Colin Healy made Cesc Fabregas look like Colin Healy"? | We miss you TLA |
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| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone on 15:06 - Jan 22 with 1251 views | giant_stow |
I have a very sad one, but not involving me. My mother in sort of law was with a guy for 15 years, until he fell ill about 6 months ago. At this point he cut off all communication with her. Wouldn't answer calls or anything - she even tried writing to him, but never got an answer. He died at Christmas and it's likely that she'll never know what his problem was.
It's a very strange feeling being so cross with a guy who just passed, but I can't help it - why did he leave her like that? |  |
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| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone on 16:58 - Jan 22 with 1147 views | Ryorry |
| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone on 15:06 - Jan 22 by giant_stow |
I have a very sad one, but not involving me. My mother in sort of law was with a guy for 15 years, until he fell ill about 6 months ago. At this point he cut off all communication with her. Wouldn't answer calls or anything - she even tried writing to him, but never got an answer. He died at Christmas and it's likely that she'll never know what his problem was.
It's a very strange feeling being so cross with a guy who just passed, but I can't help it - why did he leave her like that? |
With serious health issues, I think it’s sometimes a question of the ill person not wanting to upset friends/rellies; and/or not wanting to be a bore with details of their illness. Particularly at times like Christmas - not wanting to be a wet blanket etc. |  |
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| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone on 18:19 - Jan 22 with 1055 views | flykickingbybgunn |
Fell out with my brother after the disgraceful way he treated our parents in their final years.
No contact anymore. |  | | |
| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone on 18:31 - Jan 22 with 1043 views | mo_itfc |
This has happened to me several times.
I've also been the person to cut ties before.
It's never easy, and makes me feel terrible!!!
But this thread has really helped me, thanks for sharing everyone! | |
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| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone on 19:31 - Jan 22 with 988 views | Swailsey |
| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone on 18:31 - Jan 22 by mo_itfc |
This has happened to me several times.
I've also been the person to cut ties before.
It's never easy, and makes me feel terrible!!!
But this thread has really helped me, thanks for sharing everyone! |
There’s been several of these over the years hasn’t there, really wholesome threads. | |
| Who said: "Colin Healy made Cesc Fabregas look like Colin Healy"? | We miss you TLA |
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| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone on 19:33 - Jan 22 with 973 views | greyhound |
| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone on 19:31 - Jan 22 by Swailsey |
There’s been several of these over the years hasn’t there, really wholesome threads. |
I'll be honest this problem and the fallout still haunts me daily 2 years on...this was not the place I expected to find some solace with it. I've been broadly far to embarrassed to speak about all of it | | | |
| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone on 19:34 - Jan 22 with 964 views | MJallday |
Taylor swift will no longer return my calls |  |
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| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone on 19:35 - Jan 22 with 957 views | Swailsey |
| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone on 19:33 - Jan 22 by greyhound |
I'll be honest this problem and the fallout still haunts me daily 2 years on...this was not the place I expected to find some solace with it. I've been broadly far to embarrassed to speak about all of it |
I’m glad you’ve been able to get some closure, hopefully. You’ve got no reason to be embarrassed at all. | |
| Who said: "Colin Healy made Cesc Fabregas look like Colin Healy"? | We miss you TLA |
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| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone on 19:43 - Jan 22 with 911 views | solemio |
This is another of those threads that must make Phil and Gav proud that it appears on their website. | | | |
| Has anyone ever been completely cut off by someone on 23:14 - Jan 22 with 803 views | Libero |
Indeed, a couple of times, retrospectively, it's always been because of my own behaviour, even if the final straw seemed a bit innocuous or harsh, there's always longstanding reasons - people don't tend to cut people off for *no* reason. |  | | |
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