| Toilets at work panic 13:44 - Mar 24 with 4554 views | unbelievablue |
I find myself in the office today, for the first time in a little while. It turns out the toilets on my floor have been turned into gender neutral toilets since I last used them, including removing urinals, adding extra cubicles etc., which is great - I'm all for inclusion.
However, I missed the memo, and I must have been on autopilot as after doing the bizniz I opened the cubicle door to find a lady washing her hands, at which point I totally and utterly panicked.
I guess the takeaway here is: try and be more mindful, and less on autopilot. |  |
| |  |
| Toilets at work panic on 13:47 - Mar 24 with 3530 views | footers |
We have the same and I don't like 'em. If I'm dumping 6lbs of putrid turd I don't want the gentle womenfolk of the office anywhere near it. To come out of the stall and pretend like nothing's happened just doesn't wash with them. |  |
| |
| Toilets at work panic on 13:50 - Mar 24 with 3494 views | Swansea_Blue |
You'll be adding your pronouns after your username next! |  |
| |
| Toilets at work panic on 13:52 - Mar 24 with 3485 views | Swansea_Blue |
We've got a gender neutral toilet at work, but they just added a sign to the disabled one. I'm not sure they got the optics right there. | |
| |
| Toilets at work panic on 14:02 - Mar 24 with 3417 views | DanTheMan |
I've done this exact thing, spent ages looking for the bogs before looking at the sign again and realising the mistake I'd made. |  |
| |
| Toilets at work panic on 14:07 - Mar 24 with 3368 views | BiGDonnie |
| Toilets at work panic on 13:47 - Mar 24 by footers |
We have the same and I don't like 'em. If I'm dumping 6lbs of putrid turd I don't want the gentle womenfolk of the office anywhere near it. To come out of the stall and pretend like nothing's happened just doesn't wash with them. |
Only 6lb? Must have been your second or third of the day! |  |
| |
| Toilets at work panic on 14:32 - Mar 24 with 3301 views | Keno |
just remember if you decide you need some "additional relief' make even more sure you close the cubicle door |  |
| |
| Toilets at work panic on 14:35 - Mar 24 with 3286 views | hype313 |
| Toilets at work panic on 13:47 - Mar 24 by footers |
We have the same and I don't like 'em. If I'm dumping 6lbs of putrid turd I don't want the gentle womenfolk of the office anywhere near it. To come out of the stall and pretend like nothing's happened just doesn't wash with them. |
Two of my biggest fears is A) being in Birmingham and B) finding myself in trap 2 in Warkys office WC on a Monday morning, after his regular weekend consumptions with Tel. |  |
| |
| Toilets at work panic on 15:15 - Mar 24 with 3194 views | Churchman |
Some years ago, a regular post work drinking venue was the Stamford arms on the south side of Blackfriars Bridge. They decided to refurb the gents and while doing that turn the Ladies into a Unisex toilet.
In I rocked the first day of opening. It was clean, smelt nice, excellent thought I. One week later of blokes in pubs usage and it’d turned into Satan’s sh&£house, including a bit of Friday night paddling. For the the sake of all, I think they’re better off keeping them separate.
Anyone remember the shed and trough behind the old Churchmans stand? It was weapons grade with steam coming out of both ends in winter. A real hold your breath job. [Post edited 24 Mar 2022 21:57]
|  | | |
Login to get fewer ads
| Toilets at work panic on 16:07 - Mar 24 with 3020 views | Pendejo |
| Toilets at work panic on 14:32 - Mar 24 by Keno |
just remember if you decide you need some "additional relief' make even more sure you close the cubicle door |
At my first employer the staff used loos that were shared with customers, which tended to be respected and well kept.
My 2nd employer, a multinational insurance company over looking PR, a naive 17 yo Pendejo was shocked to find the product of additional relief over the cubicle walls.
A colleague one day showed where the additional relief mags were kept... plastic bag on top of cistern, which was one of those ones that was placed 2m up the wall.
Now, of course, you only need a mobile device and private browsing.
Oh for the days of hedgerows that sprouted magazines for additional relief. |  |
| |
| Toilets at work panic on 20:57 - Mar 24 with 2778 views | Cheltenham_Blue |
| Toilets at work panic on 15:15 - Mar 24 by Churchman |
Some years ago, a regular post work drinking venue was the Stamford arms on the south side of Blackfriars Bridge. They decided to refurb the gents and while doing that turn the Ladies into a Unisex toilet.
In I rocked the first day of opening. It was clean, smelt nice, excellent thought I. One week later of blokes in pubs usage and it’d turned into Satan’s sh&£house, including a bit of Friday night paddling. For the the sake of all, I think they’re better off keeping them separate.
Anyone remember the shed and trough behind the old Churchmans stand? It was weapons grade with steam coming out of both ends in winter. A real hold your breath job. [Post edited 24 Mar 2022 21:57]
|
Years ago, in my misspent youth, I was an assistant manager in a nightclub, and with it came the sweep of the bogs at the end of the night to check for smashed glasses, broken urinals and dead bodies. The usual stuff.
The blokes were always in a relatively poor condition but a swift kick of the Mates machine would always deliver 10-12 quid that the poor smucks had been too embarrassed to go to the bar and let anyone know that they'd been trying to buy some french letters and their cash had got stuck in the jonny machine and there by every person that tried after them too.
However, the ladies were like Satan's waiting room. Smashed glass in each and every receptical, lipstick on every single non-wipeable surface and tampons slung around the place like miniature bio hazard darts.
The 'fairer sex'? My arse. [Post edited 24 Mar 2022 20:59]
|  |
| |
| Toilets at work panic on 21:41 - Mar 24 with 2703 views | NBVJohn |
| Toilets at work panic on 15:15 - Mar 24 by Churchman |
Some years ago, a regular post work drinking venue was the Stamford arms on the south side of Blackfriars Bridge. They decided to refurb the gents and while doing that turn the Ladies into a Unisex toilet.
In I rocked the first day of opening. It was clean, smelt nice, excellent thought I. One week later of blokes in pubs usage and it’d turned into Satan’s sh&£house, including a bit of Friday night paddling. For the the sake of all, I think they’re better off keeping them separate.
Anyone remember the shed and trough behind the old Churchmans stand? It was weapons grade with steam coming out of both ends in winter. A real hold your breath job. [Post edited 24 Mar 2022 21:57]
|
That Gents in Churchman’s was the stuff of legends. The enduring measure when someone tells me a toilet is foul. I remember someone dropping their guts in there whilst it was jam packed at half time. I swear that grown men were seen emerging with a wet trouser leg rather than remain inside.
TWTD
Not even the Gents of a Wild Bean Cafe on some godforsaken petrol forecourt come close. |  | | |
| Toilets at work panic on 22:03 - Mar 24 with 2637 views | ParisBlue |
| Toilets at work panic on 14:02 - Mar 24 by DanTheMan |
I've done this exact thing, spent ages looking for the bogs before looking at the sign again and realising the mistake I'd made. |
When I was working in Saudi I went to the hotel gym, looked for the gents changing room and then it dawned on me.
No need for signs on the door. The 'ladies' aren't allowed in the gym... |  |
| |
| Toilets at work panic on 22:14 - Mar 24 with 2620 views | Reuser_is_God |
Surely the last thing women want is to share toilets with blokes? |  |
| |
| Toilets at work panic on 22:17 - Mar 24 with 2605 views | jeera |
| Toilets at work panic on 22:14 - Mar 24 by Reuser_is_God |
Surely the last thing women want is to share toilets with blokes? |
And vice versa , absolutely.
As has been pointed out already, women are also disgusting creatures.
Just in their own way.
Never the twain and everyone is happy in their ignorance with the odd idle speculation keeping everyone just about on the right side of safe. [Post edited 25 Mar 2022 16:12]
|  |
| |
| Toilets at work panic on 07:05 - Mar 25 with 2357 views | itfcjoe |
And this is seen as progress |  |
| |
| Toilets at work panic on 07:55 - Mar 25 with 2301 views | hype313 |
| Toilets at work panic on 21:41 - Mar 24 by NBVJohn |
That Gents in Churchman’s was the stuff of legends. The enduring measure when someone tells me a toilet is foul. I remember someone dropping their guts in there whilst it was jam packed at half time. I swear that grown men were seen emerging with a wet trouser leg rather than remain inside.
TWTD
Not even the Gents of a Wild Bean Cafe on some godforsaken petrol forecourt come close. |
It was horrific, just walking past was enough to turn the stomach.
I always made sure I went somewhere in town beforehand so I didn't have to venture in.
It was like the toilet in Trainspotting. | |
| |
| Toilets at work panic on 08:19 - Mar 25 with 2261 views | yesjohn99 |
| Toilets at work panic on 07:05 - Mar 25 by itfcjoe |
And this is seen as progress |
Next thing you know they’ll be letting blokes race against women at swimming!! | | | |
| Toilets at work panic on 10:22 - Mar 25 with 2154 views | Plums |
| Toilets at work panic on 21:41 - Mar 24 by NBVJohn |
That Gents in Churchman’s was the stuff of legends. The enduring measure when someone tells me a toilet is foul. I remember someone dropping their guts in there whilst it was jam packed at half time. I swear that grown men were seen emerging with a wet trouser leg rather than remain inside.
TWTD
Not even the Gents of a Wild Bean Cafe on some godforsaken petrol forecourt come close. |
I’ve never forgotten the one at Ayresome Park, it was similar to Churchman’s, just minus a roof! |  |
| |
| Toilets at work panic on 10:41 - Mar 25 with 2136 views | solemio |
| Toilets at work panic on 22:17 - Mar 24 by jeera |
And vice versa , absolutely.
As has been pointed out already, women are also disgusting creatures.
Just in their own way.
Never the twain and everyone is happy in their ignorance with the odd idle speculation keeping everyone just about on the right side of safe. [Post edited 25 Mar 2022 16:12]
|
It's getting ridiculous. You have to have a visa to go to the loo? | | | |
| Toilets at work panic on 13:40 - Mar 25 with 2070 views | textbackup |
Be more mindful that you’ve been born a male…. We are evil |  |
| |
| Toilets at work panic on 16:08 - Mar 25 with 1969 views | unbelievablue |
| Toilets at work panic on 07:05 - Mar 25 by itfcjoe |
And this is seen as progress |
I really don't have a problem with it. | |
| |
| Toilets at work panic on 16:47 - Mar 25 with 1936 views | Churchman |
| Toilets at work panic on 10:22 - Mar 25 by Plums |
I’ve never forgotten the one at Ayresome Park, it was similar to Churchman’s, just minus a roof! |
Ahh, but at least the lack of a roof meant that more of the horrors within were released faster even if it meant more immediate damage to the ozone layer.
One of the most horrific was the portaloo at Bristol Rovers’ Eastville ground. We played a cup game there in the 80s - Brennan and Cranson era. The box had a lip on it and in it was a lake. With waves. People on the outside were rocking it up and down. It was hilarious. A cold old day, but the fumes and stench coming out of that would have seen off the ice cap long before global warming | | | |
| Toilets at work panic on 16:54 - Mar 25 with 1917 views | jeera |
| Toilets at work panic on 10:41 - Mar 25 by solemio |
It's getting ridiculous. You have to have a visa to go to the loo? |
It was only a matter of time before these measures were brought it!
 | |
| |
| Toilets at work panic on 17:19 - Mar 25 with 1879 views | NBVJohn |
| Toilets at work panic on 10:22 - Mar 25 by Plums |
I’ve never forgotten the one at Ayresome Park, it was similar to Churchman’s, just minus a roof! |
Well, you see, there’s the thing.
No roof would have allowed the foul stench of rancid guts and beer p!ss out and the fresh air in. | | | |
| Toilets at work panic on 17:26 - Mar 25 with 1917 views | BlueBoots |
As others have moved the topic away from just work toilets, thought I'd throw in my own turd tales...
Interrailing through Europe as a teenager, was waiting at a small station in Italy for the last train of the day, which ended up being cancelled. Probably about a dozen passengers left, so the station master opened the waiting room and allowed us to crash there for the night until the first train. Anyway, station had one of those holes in the floor with footrests toilets - everytime someone went there, they'd return in silence looking white as a sheet...when I went myself, I realised why...someone had missed the hole and left a turd the size of a builder's forearm just next to it (30 years on, swear I struggle to remember seeing a bigger one since then) Eventually, someone in the waiting room said "So...did you see that sh1t in the toilet?", and everyone burst out laughing with a chorus of "Bloody Hell"'s and "I Know"'s.
Oh, and the other story - a friend allowed 4 mates to crash at his following his stag night, and one of them took a dump during the night in the swing-top kitchen bin, which was discovered by his fiancee the following morning; somehow she decided which of the 4 was the culprit (no idea how) and has been frosty towards him ever since. Personally, I reckon she did it herself so she could have an excuse to cut him dead... |  |
| |
| |
By continuing to use the site, you agree to our use of cookies and to abide by our Terms and Conditions.
