This isn't an ITFC poem, but for those of you starved of football-based irreverent poetry, here's my take on last weekend's cup final. Catch a recorded version on the socials soon.

Chelsea 0:1 Man City, FA Cup Final - 16/05/26

The FA Crap Final

Man City sitting, pretty, stroking the ball.
Chelsea set, a threat, and yet not at the goal.
The midfields digging so deep that they all went in the hole.
Blue on blue non-action, who knew? Leaving me cold.
A glimmer of gold from spunky Semenyo, glowing, yo-yoing
near the sticks, cheeky, flicks - the trick’s knowing where it’s going.
A bright spark in the pitch dark, a lark, parking boredom’s tears
despite the dullest of plots and the fewest shots for 20-odd years.
Here’s a fella, Cucurella, doing stellar work, a mini rocket,
like an angry clown drowned, then they put his fingers in a socket.
The pickpocket Doku danced, did I mention The Pensioners left for dead?
Four in a row, no clean sheets.
But we all should’ve stayed in bed.

@TheLinesmanPoet
@beardiverse
@thebeardiverse

StowTractor added 10:30 - May 22 Enjoyed this more than the match!!! Can you do the 3 European finals too?
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StowTractor added 10:31 - May 22 And finally an explanation for Cucurella's hairstyle.
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Bluebass added 13:53 - May 22 Maybe a Southampton ditty too ?
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armchaircritic59 added 18:12 - May 22 Well it certainly wasn't the greatest final in living memory, interestingly Chelsea were involved in possibly the worse one I've ever seen when De Mateo scored the only goal of the match inside a minute, and the rest was worse than forgettable! As Bluebass says above, try a Southampton ditty!
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