| Feeling rather gutted and a little down 19:11 - Mar 22 with 5054 views | tonybied |
We've been saving for a house for what feels like forever. We're first time buyers and my mother recently has very kindly offered to top up our deposit so we can start looking sooner rather than later. Since Christmas we've been scrimping and saving to make our finances look spick and span, ready for us to make our mortgage application once we find somewhere.
Our eyes have been peeled on Zoopla, Rightmove etc since Christmas, and earlier this week, what looked and felt like the perfect property popped up! It's been a whirlwind end to the week since then. I found a well respected, local mortgage broker, we got an AIP in place, all the documents sorted. We went for a viewing of the property yesterday afternoon and we loved it. We tried our best not to fall in love with it, as we know stuff frequently happens when trying to buy property, but that's easier said than done!
The estate agent said he would call us this morning for feedback and to gauge our interest. Got the call this morning, asked a couple more questions that had been forgotten at the viewing and informed the agent that were happy to go ahead with an offer at the guide price. The agent said there had been quite a few viewings and plenty of interest, they were going to speak to all interested parties and that the vendors would make a decision on if they wanted to accept any offers by close of play today. Cue another call early in the afternoon, stating that they don't want a bidding war but there's a few offers on the table, they asked that we make our best and final offers. I told him we could stretch to another 5k and was told that he would speak to the other parties and then a final decision would be made. 2 1/2 hours of furious nail chewing ensued and the phone rings...sorry, close but no cigar! Vendor chose a higher offer.
Nothing else is available currently that seems to come remotely close, I think it may take a little time to find something else that we'll be happy to consider!
It was just our first attempt, and we know others will come along (possibly with more bumps in the road too) but the speed of it all initially and the emotion it stirred has been rather a shock to the system. It's really knocked me about a bit. It's really surprised me how some bricks and mortar I stared at for less than half an hour has affected me! I feel a little silly!
Apologies, there wasn't too much point to this rather long-winded waffle but it feels better just to get it off the chest!
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| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 19:38 - Mar 22 with 3753 views | CBBlue |
Don't want to give you false hope but keep in touch with the agent in case the buyer pulls out to make sure they know how keen you are. When we sold we had 2 potential buyers pull out for different reasons so it can happen.
However, in that time we lost the house we wanted to purchase. In hindsight, best thing that ever happened to us. Ended up buying a house better suited with fab neighbours and great local schools (whereas the catchment school at our 'lost' property now has a dreadful reputation.
Whatever will be will be and I strongly believe everything happen for a reason. |  |
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| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 19:41 - Mar 22 with 3725 views | BanksterDebtSlave |
If it is any consolation it took us 7 years of looking to find and eventually secure a place. This included several goes at the best and final thing, always close but not close enough. Anyway, in the end we got the best one and when I drive past the other ones they don't come close. Perhaps good things do come to those that wait. |  |
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| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 19:50 - Mar 22 with 3656 views | Eireannach_gorm |
Sorry to hear of the disappointing outcome of your first attempt at purchasing a house but unfortunately it is part and parcel of this process. There is a certain amount of luck involved in this whole house buying thing and you only need to get it right once. You have have sorted your finances now so just go again in confidence and in the words of Samuel Beckett, "Try again, fail again, fail better". |  | | |
| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 19:51 - Mar 22 with 3655 views | azuremerlangus |
Tony, don’t be too downhearted - the housing market moves in mysterious ways. There be another one along before you know it.
Don’t forgot you have seen us win this season! |  |
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| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 19:57 - Mar 22 with 3600 views | Swansea_Blue |
The whole process sucks. I’ve been there both in your shoes and on the other side. Neither’s nice. There’s something to be said for the Scottish sealed bids approach. Once it gets to a negotiation it just causes grief. We had one where a were nearly at exchange of contract and the buyer pulled out because they said they wanted more more (it still hadn’t sold by the time we found another place, so fk ‘em lol).
We missed out on a couple of ‘ideal’ homes when we were looking for our family home. In hindsight it did us a favour and we ended up somewhere I now couldn’t imagine not living in. It took us about 15 months to find it, so keep going, try not to worry too much about it all and I’m sure you’ll find somewhere eventually. |  |
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| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 20:03 - Mar 22 with 3578 views | textbackup |
True story here - estate agents are thick as pig sht. A house sells itself and there is really no need for them at all.
Chin up tho mate, plenty of places out there and you’ll find something perfect for you
Edit. When you do find ‘the one’ exchange details with the person selling (if possible) In front of the estate agents, that way they know they can’t BS you. And it’ll make you feel all warm inside [Post edited 22 Mar 20:38]
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| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 20:05 - Mar 22 with 3574 views | tonybied |
| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 19:51 - Mar 22 by azuremerlangus |
Tony, don’t be too downhearted - the housing market moves in mysterious ways. There be another one along before you know it.
Don’t forgot you have seen us win this season! |
Thanks all for the comments, the feelings are easing slightly but I literally wanted to cry earlier!
@azuremerlangus - Thanks buddy, I feel better in the fact that there's a minority of us Towen fans that can say that this year! | | | |
| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 20:07 - Mar 22 with 3563 views | ArnoldMoorhen |
| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 19:38 - Mar 22 by CBBlue |
Don't want to give you false hope but keep in touch with the agent in case the buyer pulls out to make sure they know how keen you are. When we sold we had 2 potential buyers pull out for different reasons so it can happen.
However, in that time we lost the house we wanted to purchase. In hindsight, best thing that ever happened to us. Ended up buying a house better suited with fab neighbours and great local schools (whereas the catchment school at our 'lost' property now has a dreadful reputation.
Whatever will be will be and I strongly believe everything happen for a reason. |
And to add to this:
Make it absolutely clear to the Agent again that you are First Time Buyers with no chain, with Mortgage Agreed and ready to move.
If the sellers do get messed around by this buyer they will be more likely to favour a less complicated buyer, possibly even over one offering slightly more money. | | | |
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| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 20:10 - Mar 22 with 3541 views | WicklowBlue |
Sorry to hear that Tony, been there and got several tshirts. It's hard not to fall in love with various houses.
We recently traded up, spent 18 months looking at places some we liked some we loathed. Then suddenly last May a house came on the market the missus viewed it as I was travelling with work. She loved it, I had a second viewing and the EA hadn't a clue, didn't know it had underfloor heating etc.
Went off to Barcelona with work thinking about it, and registered uploading my AIP and proof of funds on the EA website to monitor bids. In the middle of meetings I had 3 calls from the EA, during a break rang them back and was asked did I want to put in a bid, there was a bid at the asking price so I thought sod it put in a bid 10k above the asking. An hour later the bid was accepted and we're now enjoying our new Wicklow, Ireland pad.
I'm sure none of the above softens the blow on your side, but what I am working towards is that if it's meant to be it will happen. Like buying cars, if it is fate it will happen.
Now you have AIP keep saving and looking around your dream home will happen don't get disheartened!There is another dream house out there for you. |  | | |
| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 20:11 - Mar 22 with 3540 views | Ryorry |
| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 19:38 - Mar 22 by CBBlue |
Don't want to give you false hope but keep in touch with the agent in case the buyer pulls out to make sure they know how keen you are. When we sold we had 2 potential buyers pull out for different reasons so it can happen.
However, in that time we lost the house we wanted to purchase. In hindsight, best thing that ever happened to us. Ended up buying a house better suited with fab neighbours and great local schools (whereas the catchment school at our 'lost' property now has a dreadful reputation.
Whatever will be will be and I strongly believe everything happen for a reason. |
Similar story - vendors upped price by £70k on day of supposed exchange of contracts.
I refused, found much nicer and better house shortly afterwards (where I’m still very happy) - and it took vendors of original house another 2 years to sell that, when apparently they were all packed up ready to go, they were so sure I’d cave in 😂 |  |
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| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 20:13 - Mar 22 with 3513 views | WicklowBlue |
| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 20:07 - Mar 22 by ArnoldMoorhen |
And to add to this:
Make it absolutely clear to the Agent again that you are First Time Buyers with no chain, with Mortgage Agreed and ready to move.
If the sellers do get messed around by this buyer they will be more likely to favour a less complicated buyer, possibly even over one offering slightly more money. |
Huge +1 on this, not being part of a chain is a huge advantage second only really to a cash buyer. That's why my bid was accepted as the seller needed to move fast to secure their new home. | | | |
| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 20:16 - Mar 22 with 3494 views | J2BLUE |
Sorry to hear that.
They don't want a bidding war lol. Of course not. |  |
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| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 20:23 - Mar 22 with 3465 views | tonybied |
| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 20:07 - Mar 22 by ArnoldMoorhen |
And to add to this:
Make it absolutely clear to the Agent again that you are First Time Buyers with no chain, with Mortgage Agreed and ready to move.
If the sellers do get messed around by this buyer they will be more likely to favour a less complicated buyer, possibly even over one offering slightly more money. |
I did make this very clear at the viewing and asked the agent to inform the vendor of the fact in our call in the morning. It didn't seem to sway the decision, they were just happy to go with the highest bid. When we arrived to view the property last night another couple that looked a bit too well off came out of the house and drove off in their Mercedes, I'm just guessing here but I have a feeling they were the highest bidders and that they're just buying to let. I think the vendor is more interested in the cash than the situation of the buyer, which of course is fair enough but annoying for us.
It has at least given me some education in the experience! I have learnt today that if I get asked to make a best and final offer again to make sure I don't raise the bid by a 5k increment. I learnt that it's better to raise by a figure like 5.6k! As it may well make you the highest bidder, and even though is not by much you'll be surprised by how often the vendor will accept just because it's a few quid higher!
Still, we live and learn! [Post edited 22 Mar 20:27]
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| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 20:34 - Mar 22 with 3370 views | WicklowBlue |
| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 20:23 - Mar 22 by tonybied |
I did make this very clear at the viewing and asked the agent to inform the vendor of the fact in our call in the morning. It didn't seem to sway the decision, they were just happy to go with the highest bid. When we arrived to view the property last night another couple that looked a bit too well off came out of the house and drove off in their Mercedes, I'm just guessing here but I have a feeling they were the highest bidders and that they're just buying to let. I think the vendor is more interested in the cash than the situation of the buyer, which of course is fair enough but annoying for us.
It has at least given me some education in the experience! I have learnt today that if I get asked to make a best and final offer again to make sure I don't raise the bid by a 5k increment. I learnt that it's better to raise by a figure like 5.6k! As it may well make you the highest bidder, and even though is not by much you'll be surprised by how often the vendor will accept just because it's a few quid higher!
Still, we live and learn! [Post edited 22 Mar 20:27]
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As with all bidding decide on your top offer now matter how much you love a place. No point in putting yourself deep in debt eating off the floor for a decade.
Chin up mate! | | | |
| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 20:47 - Mar 22 with 3222 views | PhilTWTD |
| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 20:23 - Mar 22 by tonybied |
I did make this very clear at the viewing and asked the agent to inform the vendor of the fact in our call in the morning. It didn't seem to sway the decision, they were just happy to go with the highest bid. When we arrived to view the property last night another couple that looked a bit too well off came out of the house and drove off in their Mercedes, I'm just guessing here but I have a feeling they were the highest bidders and that they're just buying to let. I think the vendor is more interested in the cash than the situation of the buyer, which of course is fair enough but annoying for us.
It has at least given me some education in the experience! I have learnt today that if I get asked to make a best and final offer again to make sure I don't raise the bid by a 5k increment. I learnt that it's better to raise by a figure like 5.6k! As it may well make you the highest bidder, and even though is not by much you'll be surprised by how often the vendor will accept just because it's a few quid higher!
Still, we live and learn! [Post edited 22 Mar 20:27]
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We got our first house for £xxx,100 working on that principle. Have also had similar experiences to yours on missing out on properties. It is gutting at the time, but there are always other houses, often which surpass the one you were after originally. Agree with others that it's worth staying in the loop in case the sale breaks down, which they often do for one reason or another. |  | | |
| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 20:51 - Mar 22 with 3185 views | Lord_Lucan |
Don't get dejected.
My daughter moved house about two or three years ago and there were a couple on heartbreaks along the way.
Turns out, which it very often does, they ended up with an even better house. |  |
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| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 21:01 - Mar 22 with 3122 views | vapour_trail |
| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 20:51 - Mar 22 by Lord_Lucan |
Don't get dejected.
My daughter moved house about two or three years ago and there were a couple on heartbreaks along the way.
Turns out, which it very often does, they ended up with an even better house. |
This 100%.
You’ll land something that will be great. Always a few hurdles along the way. |  |
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| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 21:01 - Mar 22 with 3119 views | tonybied |
| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 20:51 - Mar 22 by Lord_Lucan |
Don't get dejected.
My daughter moved house about two or three years ago and there were a couple on heartbreaks along the way.
Turns out, which it very often does, they ended up with an even better house. |
Definitely feeling better as there's a few that have said as much now! I will be dead pleased if we find something else that fits better than this would've for our first home.
Much love for all the kind words and d info guys, it's 100% appreciated x | | | |
| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 08:52 - Mar 23 with 2624 views | OldFart71 |
I would like to say I am surprised we don't have a similar situation as Scotland and even Canada where you make an offer, if accepted then both yourself and the seller are committed to the sale. I am however surprised that the house you viewed has had several offers as the market seems flat. My Daughter has a lovely little cottage in Sproughton that she has up for sale. She has only had one viewing in about three months and that was when it first was marketed. A property near where I live in Needham Market has also been on the market for many months. Loads of viewings and people are interested but not that many first time buyers to start a chain. | | | |
| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 09:34 - Mar 23 with 2529 views | Benters |
The rotters !
I’m sure something else will pop up again soon that will take your fancy. |  |
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| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 09:39 - Mar 23 with 2510 views | Churchman |
Lots of good responses in this thread.
House buying is one of the most stressful thing you will ever do. It isn’t just the costly, should have been reformed decades ago, process, it’s also that you are dealing with people who will probably not have the same standards of behaviour as you. So are certain key points in my view:
1. Don’t get disheartened, keep going. You will get what you want in the end. Persistence is everything
2. The Estate Agent is acting for the vendor, not you. But against this he wants his commission. For a property in demand, his job is easy. When times are slow, it’s difficult and the agent will work harder for the buyer to ultimately get his crust.
3. While looking, keep your discipline and keep saving! Don’t let the house buying process consume you so try and switch off from it when not actively engaged with it - if only to watch us lose at home again.
4. This is a personal thing, but in my limited dealings with this I’ve always made it clear to Agents, buyers and sellers I am not going to be messed around with. If my offer is accepted I expect it to be honoured. Have people tried it on? Yes, but I’ve stuck with that principle.
5. My word is everything to me, as is being straight with people. No bidding wars, last minute price hikes, being played off. Any of that stuff and I’m out. There are some right bits of sht out there and accepting that is important. You don’t have to be them.
6. Research and legwork. Houses, area, transport links, height above sea level, you name it. Got to be done. The internet saves visiting estate agents offices as much as you used to have to and you can filter, search etc as you have found out. But boots on the ground, meeting people, making a pest of yourself, looking at places - there’s no substitute for hard work.
7. Try not to be disappointed if things don’t go right. You are treading the same well worn path as just about everyone that’s tried to buy or sell a property.
You will get there, however down you feel. Just view it as ‘wasn’t the one’, ‘dodged a bullet’, ‘I will find a better one’ etc. |  | | |
| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 09:44 - Mar 23 with 2501 views | tonybied |
| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 08:52 - Mar 23 by OldFart71 |
I would like to say I am surprised we don't have a similar situation as Scotland and even Canada where you make an offer, if accepted then both yourself and the seller are committed to the sale. I am however surprised that the house you viewed has had several offers as the market seems flat. My Daughter has a lovely little cottage in Sproughton that she has up for sale. She has only had one viewing in about three months and that was when it first was marketed. A property near where I live in Needham Market has also been on the market for many months. Loads of viewings and people are interested but not that many first time buyers to start a chain. |
To be honest, I think the guide price was a little low on the property. We've seen nothing with all the "extras" this had since we started keeping an eye on things in December. We've seen quite a few houses that ticked all our "musts", and a few of our "wants" but nothing that ticks pretty much all those and more. | | | |
| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 09:49 - Mar 23 with 2481 views | tonybied |
| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 09:39 - Mar 23 by Churchman |
Lots of good responses in this thread.
House buying is one of the most stressful thing you will ever do. It isn’t just the costly, should have been reformed decades ago, process, it’s also that you are dealing with people who will probably not have the same standards of behaviour as you. So are certain key points in my view:
1. Don’t get disheartened, keep going. You will get what you want in the end. Persistence is everything
2. The Estate Agent is acting for the vendor, not you. But against this he wants his commission. For a property in demand, his job is easy. When times are slow, it’s difficult and the agent will work harder for the buyer to ultimately get his crust.
3. While looking, keep your discipline and keep saving! Don’t let the house buying process consume you so try and switch off from it when not actively engaged with it - if only to watch us lose at home again.
4. This is a personal thing, but in my limited dealings with this I’ve always made it clear to Agents, buyers and sellers I am not going to be messed around with. If my offer is accepted I expect it to be honoured. Have people tried it on? Yes, but I’ve stuck with that principle.
5. My word is everything to me, as is being straight with people. No bidding wars, last minute price hikes, being played off. Any of that stuff and I’m out. There are some right bits of sht out there and accepting that is important. You don’t have to be them.
6. Research and legwork. Houses, area, transport links, height above sea level, you name it. Got to be done. The internet saves visiting estate agents offices as much as you used to have to and you can filter, search etc as you have found out. But boots on the ground, meeting people, making a pest of yourself, looking at places - there’s no substitute for hard work.
7. Try not to be disappointed if things don’t go right. You are treading the same well worn path as just about everyone that’s tried to buy or sell a property.
You will get there, however down you feel. Just view it as ‘wasn’t the one’, ‘dodged a bullet’, ‘I will find a better one’ etc. |
Thanks for the tips, it's all appreciated and being added to the bank of knowledge, that currently holds a rather meagre balance! [Post edited 23 Mar 10:04]
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| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 10:00 - Mar 23 with 2410 views | Churchman |
| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 09:49 - Mar 23 by tonybied |
Thanks for the tips, it's all appreciated and being added to the bank of knowledge, that currently holds a rather meagre balance! [Post edited 23 Mar 10:04]
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Acquire as much knowledge as you can from as many sources as you can. Much of it will be wrong or won’t fit you, but that’s ok. Filtering the useful from the useless can only be done if you have the information in the first place.
Look, listen, learn. And try not to let frustrations show. Think McKenna press conferences. As it goes, you probably know far more than you think you do. | | | |
| Feeling rather gutted and a little down on 10:09 - Mar 23 with 2369 views | _clive_baker_ |
Chambers has managed to sell it then.
In all seriousness I can sympathise. My advice would be don’t entirely give up on it, a lot of agreed sales don’t complete for whatever reason so make sure you’re front of mind with the agent should that situation arise. The extra few £k will make naff all difference to an agent when they’re getting 1% of it, they just want it sold so sell yourself, your commitment and your position to them for this and future ones. Equally don’t fully expect that either, it’s probably more unlikely than likely at this stag, so move on emotionally and if it happens it happens.
As others have said, a FTB with an AIP and ready to move is very attractive, especially in this market. Make sure you leverage the strength of your position.
I dare say you’ll look back at some point when you’re in a lovely place of your own and think things happened for a reason, they tend to work themselves out. |  | | |
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