| New job dilemma 22:47 - May 8 with 2454 views | Paul |
Applied for and was successful in securing a new management role, which is something I have been working towards for years.
However, it has now emerged that the role is 100% on-site with no flexibility which does not work for us as a family. My current role, in the same profession, is 90% remote working so it's very frustrating that the management role isn't even hybrid. Have asked about hybrid options but been told it's not an option.
I have not signed the contract offer yet. My instinct is to reject the job and stay where I am as I have to put my family first, but wondered what the users of TWTD would do? |  | | |  |
| New job dilemma on 22:51 - May 8 with 1868 views | giant_stow |
We're they vague about it? Sounds so. Listen to your instinct, IMHO, especially if you asked them and they said no. |  |
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| New job dilemma on 22:52 - May 8 with 1859 views | Whos_blue |
Go with your instinct mate. |  |
| Distortion becomes somehow pure in its wildness. |
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| New job dilemma on 06:16 - May 9 with 1634 views | itfc_bucks |
Left a hybrid role that I enjoyed for a significant pay rise but a fully on site role.
Turned out boss was a d!ck and I ended up leaving, via a breakdown.
Now back in hybrid, ten grand below where I had been originally.
Always trust your gut instinct. |  | | |
| New job dilemma on 06:52 - May 9 with 1553 views | PMac13 |
Family comes first, listen to your gut…. |  | | |
| New job dilemma on 07:00 - May 9 with 1524 views | MJallday |
I’ve gone from 100% home working (5 years) to 100% in the office (since June last year)
If it wasn’t for the fact they fly me around the world Every few weeks I’d have really struggled
It’s a dont do it from me |  |
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| New job dilemma on 07:18 - May 9 with 1461 views | Churchman |
I would literally list out the pro’s and cons of taking it. Can you adapt domestics to fit with what what they require? Is it a long term role or short? What are your employers like to work for? What are the alternatives?
They’ve offered you the job so they want you. If you reject it give your reasons and say what you are prepared to do, they may accommodate you. If they don’t, it’s probably the wrong job anyway.
Most of all, go with your instincts as others have said. And when you make your decision, don’t look back. No regrets. [Post edited 9 May 9:29]
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| New job dilemma on 07:37 - May 9 with 1389 views | Len_Brennan |
",,, which DOES NOT work for us as a family".
I think your answer is in that sentence I'm afraid.
I was in a similar situation a few years back, when my wife got a promotion which came up unexpectedly, shortly after she returned from maternity leave.
The hours were long, with quite a bit of travel; so when a position came up that I had been earmarked for, also with long hours & little flexibility, I had to let it go, as it would have meant little or no daytime spent with the kids, for either of us, from Monday to Friday.
Look, I'm not saying it's easy, especially when you have been working towards something professionally, and I certainty did/do think about how things might have been, but honestly, I have no regrets for the decision to put family first. My wife would often be jealous of me as I told her of heading to the park with bikes or scooters after the childcare pickup etc. Who knows how the pressure of having little flexibility in both our jobs at that time would have affected the family & the marriage.
Your situation will change in a few years & you'll get another chance, but you'll never get back the days when your children are young. | | | |
| New job dilemma on 07:39 - May 9 with 1384 views | Pippin1970 |
Work life balance in any job. Doesn't matter if you cleaner up to CEO. Money isn't everything especially as you get older. | | | |
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| New job dilemma on 07:56 - May 9 with 1318 views | redrickstuhaart |
| New job dilemma on 07:39 - May 9 by Pippin1970 |
Work life balance in any job. Doesn't matter if you cleaner up to CEO. Money isn't everything especially as you get older. |
Equally depends on your family situation.
Age of kids. Whether you are actually appreciated or just a provider... | | | |
| New job dilemma on 08:01 - May 9 with 1294 views | BlueBoots |
Think you've answered the question yourself in your second paragraph; if you need some WFH flexibility for family reasons and the company can't offer you that as part of the job, it's not for you; it's a lot easier to find another job than another family...
If you've been offered this job, hopefully another company can offer you a similar role with the option of remote working. Unless you have a dream job that you would willingly do for no pay, people who work to live, rather than live to work will have a less stressful and happier life. |  |
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| New job dilemma on 08:08 - May 9 with 1279 views | blueasfook |
Would have been one of the questions I asked at the preliminary stages. I have worked from home since Covid lockdowns and got used to it now. I wouldnt even consider a role that required me to be in the office 5 days a week. For most office-based staff now at least some WFH is normal.
Tell 'em to stuff it. |  |
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| New job dilemma on 08:14 - May 9 with 1227 views | NedPlimpton |
Can't imagine anyone is going to come on here and say "stuff your family, take the job". And I think you probably know that
Therefore I imagine you already know what to do |  | | |
| New job dilemma on 08:17 - May 9 with 1187 views | Pippin1970 |
| New job dilemma on 07:56 - May 9 by redrickstuhaart |
Equally depends on your family situation.
Age of kids. Whether you are actually appreciated or just a provider... |
As long as you enjoy life all that matters . | | | |
| New job dilemma on 08:17 - May 9 with 1189 views | Fixed_It |
Stuff your family, take the job.*
*If that sounds wrong, you know what to do. |  |
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| New job dilemma on 08:18 - May 9 with 1180 views | WD19 |
Stuff your family, take the job. |  | | |
| New job dilemma on 08:19 - May 9 with 1179 views | blueasfook |
| New job dilemma on 08:18 - May 9 by WD19 |
Stuff your family, take the job. |
Stuff your family and your job, move to Thailand and hook up with a ladyboy | |
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| New job dilemma on 08:19 - May 9 with 1172 views | textbackup |
If a role doesn’t give you family flexibility, the chance to WFH if needed, then IMO that company wouldn’t be great to work for.
We spend so little time on this planet, that spending it in an office full of people that aren’t your friends, being just a number and easily replaceable, just doesn’t seem a well spent amount of time.
The only place you can’t be replaced is at home. |  |
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| New job dilemma on 08:21 - May 9 with 1148 views | giant_stow |
| New job dilemma on 08:19 - May 9 by textbackup |
If a role doesn’t give you family flexibility, the chance to WFH if needed, then IMO that company wouldn’t be great to work for.
We spend so little time on this planet, that spending it in an office full of people that aren’t your friends, being just a number and easily replaceable, just doesn’t seem a well spent amount of time.
The only place you can’t be replaced is at home. |
wise words | |
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| New job dilemma on 08:38 - May 9 with 1081 views | textbackup |
| New job dilemma on 08:21 - May 9 by giant_stow |
wise words |
I spent a ridiculous amount of hours doing shift work, grabbing overtime, thinking that the only thing that mattered was the money coming in.
I sit back now and realise I don’t remember too much from my youngests first 2/3/4 years, and it pisses me off so much. Yeah we done some nice things, nice holidays, renovated a house and made a few quid. But I’ll always hate myself a bit for that.
(By no means was I never there, I just mean I was tired, surviving on 4/5 hours sleep, so Ididn’t take it all in properly) | |
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| New job dilemma on 08:44 - May 9 with 1044 views | MattinLondon |
Job interviews are for you to impress a potential new employer and for them to impress a potential new employee.
Your use of the word ‘emerges’ sounds like they weren’t entirely transparent with you to start off with - so that would concern me as what else won’t they be 100% truthful with you about? |  | | |
| New job dilemma on 08:51 - May 9 with 1005 views | artsbossbeard |
Not sure how it's got to the job offer stage without this being discussed prior? |  |
| Please note: prior to hitting the post button, I've double checked for anything that could be construed as "Anti Semitic" and to the best of my knowledge it isn't. Anything deemed to be of a Xenophobic nature is therefore purely accidental or down to your own misconstruing. | | Poll: | Raining in IP8 - shall I get the washing in? |
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| New job dilemma on 08:54 - May 9 with 984 views | artsbossbeard |
| New job dilemma on 08:19 - May 9 by textbackup |
If a role doesn’t give you family flexibility, the chance to WFH if needed, then IMO that company wouldn’t be great to work for.
We spend so little time on this planet, that spending it in an office full of people that aren’t your friends, being just a number and easily replaceable, just doesn’t seem a well spent amount of time.
The only place you can’t be replaced is at home. |
The horror words that I dread reading:
"We're organising a Team night out" & "Friday"
Not only have I got to spend time with people I don't class as friends, I've got to give up a Friday night. Ba5tards. | |
| Please note: prior to hitting the post button, I've double checked for anything that could be construed as "Anti Semitic" and to the best of my knowledge it isn't. Anything deemed to be of a Xenophobic nature is therefore purely accidental or down to your own misconstruing. | | Poll: | Raining in IP8 - shall I get the washing in? |
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| New job dilemma on 08:56 - May 9 with 966 views | TIB |
Definitely go with your gut. I was offered a job last week but felt the same, that it would create some uncertainty around daily workings as a family which when I began weighing it up, just didn’t seem worth it so I declined the job.
They appreciated my honesty around why I declined it, and I also spoke to my current employer explaining why I’d applied for another job and they’re now looking at ways to take on my feedback.
Your gut doesn’t get it wrong often, and honesty always the best route. |  |
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| New job dilemma on 08:57 - May 9 with 959 views | giant_stow |
| New job dilemma on 08:38 - May 9 by textbackup |
I spent a ridiculous amount of hours doing shift work, grabbing overtime, thinking that the only thing that mattered was the money coming in.
I sit back now and realise I don’t remember too much from my youngests first 2/3/4 years, and it pisses me off so much. Yeah we done some nice things, nice holidays, renovated a house and made a few quid. But I’ll always hate myself a bit for that.
(By no means was I never there, I just mean I was tired, surviving on 4/5 hours sleep, so Ididn’t take it all in properly) |
I get you, but don't beat yourself up fella - you did what you thought was right at the time. | |
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| Nb dma on 08:58 - May 9 with 953 views | bluelagos |
You are weighing up a life style question vs a career question.
Obviously in the short term, working from home enjoying family time is a huge plus. But in the long term taking a role that will likely result in better pay, better future options and possibly a chance to retire early is not to be sniffed at.
Much will depend on where you are in your career and how much you value family time. Is moving a possibility too?
I'd also talk it though with the Mrs as she will know the issues too. |  |
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