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Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app 14:33 - Dec 17 with 7826 viewsThe_Flashing_Smile

Should men compliment/chat up women?

The context is an Amazon delivery driver asking a woman he was delivering a parcel to if she's single as she's beautiful.

The majority on there (essentially nosey neighbours with an app) want him strung up, police involved, sacked etc. (during a pandemic, nice!) While I can understand the woman felt intimidated and vulnerable, it'd be a sad world we live in if a guy can't tell a woman he fancies her with a view to a date etc. Are we left with dating apps as the only acceptable way to meet people now?

Hard for me as a man, though, to understand what it's like being harassed by sleazy blokes trying it on. Particularly in an employee/customer situation.

It's a tricky one IMO.

Certainly, years ago, it seemed most couples met through work. I imagine that's massively down now for fear of losing your job at a disciplinary hearing!

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Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 14:36 - Dec 17 with 2540 viewsJakeITFC

Dating somebody you work with is very different from the scenario you're talking about here, seeing as both people want that to happen presumably.

I wouldn't go as far as saying the driver needs sacking, but this is clearly not on is it.
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Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 14:36 - Dec 17 with 2535 viewsSuperblue95

“Hard for me as a man, though, to understand what it's like being harassed by sleazy blokes trying it on”

Wanna find out?

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Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 14:38 - Dec 17 with 2518 viewsfooters

Absolutely not. He's working so should behave in a professional manner towards a client.

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Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 14:38 - Dec 17 with 2522 viewsBlueLikeJazz

I wouldn't want him sacked necessarily, but I would not appreciate that in the slightest. Utterly inappropriate and creepy, and I don't agree with you that it's 'a tricky one'.
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Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 14:39 - Dec 17 with 2512 viewsJ2BLUE

Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 14:36 - Dec 17 by JakeITFC

Dating somebody you work with is very different from the scenario you're talking about here, seeing as both people want that to happen presumably.

I wouldn't go as far as saying the driver needs sacking, but this is clearly not on is it.


Clearly not on? Unless it was a lot different to how it's written in the OP it sounds like he complimented her and asked if she was single? Hardly a crime.

I can't see the fuss unless it was a lot worse.

Truly impaired.
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Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 14:47 - Dec 17 with 2449 viewsThe_Flashing_Smile

Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 14:36 - Dec 17 by JakeITFC

Dating somebody you work with is very different from the scenario you're talking about here, seeing as both people want that to happen presumably.

I wouldn't go as far as saying the driver needs sacking, but this is clearly not on is it.


What if she fancied him as well? It's basically two strangers meeting - the stuff of a hundred romantic movies.

(I'm just playing devil's advocate BTW, I wouldn't do it myself).

Trust the process. Trust Phil.

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Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 14:51 - Dec 17 with 2423 viewsSaleAway

Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 14:36 - Dec 17 by JakeITFC

Dating somebody you work with is very different from the scenario you're talking about here, seeing as both people want that to happen presumably.

I wouldn't go as far as saying the driver needs sacking, but this is clearly not on is it.


"both people want that to happen"

How do they find that out, without one of them asking?

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Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 14:56 - Dec 17 with 2397 viewstractorboy1978

The police involved? Jesus wept.
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Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 14:57 - Dec 17 with 2397 viewsKeno

PAH!!!

I am deeply offended as no Amazon delivery has ever said this to me

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Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 14:57 - Dec 17 with 2398 viewseireblue

Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 14:47 - Dec 17 by The_Flashing_Smile

What if she fancied him as well? It's basically two strangers meeting - the stuff of a hundred romantic movies.

(I'm just playing devil's advocate BTW, I wouldn't do it myself).


The Amazon driver could pop a note through the door.

In a similar-ish scenario, a female family member was given a note.

If Amazon driver doesn't put a little bit of thought and effort in, doesn't bode well, since we know some like to just dump and run.
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Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 15:00 - Dec 17 with 2374 viewsKeno

Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 14:57 - Dec 17 by eireblue

The Amazon driver could pop a note through the door.

In a similar-ish scenario, a female family member was given a note.

If Amazon driver doesn't put a little bit of thought and effort in, doesn't bode well, since we know some like to just dump and run.


If it was Hermes the driver would deliver it to the wrong house

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Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 15:01 - Dec 17 with 2364 viewsJakeITFC

Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 14:51 - Dec 17 by SaleAway

"both people want that to happen"

How do they find that out, without one of them asking?


Get an amazon driver to ask for them.
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Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 15:30 - Dec 17 with 2296 viewsfactual_blue

Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 14:57 - Dec 17 by Keno

PAH!!!

I am deeply offended as no Amazon delivery has ever said this to me


Offended, but not surprised.

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Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 15:31 - Dec 17 with 2298 viewshoppy

Had he asked her details about whether he could leave something in her 'safe place'.

If it did all happen and work out romantically for them, how long would it be before he was leaving her a note saying "While you were out, I left a package with your neighbour"...

You have to think of these things.

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Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 15:35 - Dec 17 with 2279 viewsfactual_blue

Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 14:57 - Dec 17 by eireblue

The Amazon driver could pop a note through the door.

In a similar-ish scenario, a female family member was given a note.

If Amazon driver doesn't put a little bit of thought and effort in, doesn't bode well, since we know some like to just dump and run.


I've lost count of your euphemisms there.

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Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 15:37 - Dec 17 with 2286 viewsDyland

How is that "through work" (in the sense I think you're talking about)?

I'm a completely unreconstructed middle aged middle class honky from Essex/Suffolk and even I think that is 100% unacceptable. If it had been the other way round, the customer making a comment to the delivery driver, less of a big deal, though these days that may also be frowned upon I guess. Making that comment to the person at their home is way out of line, and probably a sacking offence unless no previous disciplinary record.

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Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 15:40 - Dec 17 with 2263 viewsjeera

Are things like dropping notes or Valentines cards stalking?

Man, when I was a kid you sent a girl flowers with a contact number to her works/home/wherever. It was considered romantic and worth a shot.

I'm too old for that but if you want to get to know a stranger, how does that work then if you're too afraid to give a compliment etc?

Is stalking people on FB an acceptable alternative instead?

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Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 15:40 - Dec 17 with 2271 viewsDyland

Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 14:47 - Dec 17 by The_Flashing_Smile

What if she fancied him as well? It's basically two strangers meeting - the stuff of a hundred romantic movies.

(I'm just playing devil's advocate BTW, I wouldn't do it myself).


"What if she fancied him as well? It's basically two strangers meeting - the stuff of a hundred romantic movies."

LOL. What if she doesn't!

She's at home. More the stuff of a hundred stalker/psycho/slasher movies innit.

I know you're not condoning it ;)

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Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 15:41 - Dec 17 with 2257 viewsfactual_blue

Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 15:00 - Dec 17 by Keno

If it was Hermes the driver would deliver it to the wrong house


Reminds me of this (at 2m 19s)



And 3m 14s is good too

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Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 15:43 - Dec 17 with 2250 viewsjeera

Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 15:37 - Dec 17 by Dyland

How is that "through work" (in the sense I think you're talking about)?

I'm a completely unreconstructed middle aged middle class honky from Essex/Suffolk and even I think that is 100% unacceptable. If it had been the other way round, the customer making a comment to the delivery driver, less of a big deal, though these days that may also be frowned upon I guess. Making that comment to the person at their home is way out of line, and probably a sacking offence unless no previous disciplinary record.


Young chap who was working for my dad at the time, had a thing for this lass and she barely noticed him.

She worked upstairs in some offices in Stowmarket.

One day he grabbed a piece of card and wrote a message, stood in the middle of the road and held it up until one of her colleagues spotted it and got her.

They were together for years. No one even called the police or anything.

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Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 15:43 - Dec 17 with 2252 viewsfooters

Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 15:40 - Dec 17 by Dyland

"What if she fancied him as well? It's basically two strangers meeting - the stuff of a hundred romantic movies."

LOL. What if she doesn't!

She's at home. More the stuff of a hundred stalker/psycho/slasher movies innit.

I know you're not condoning it ;)


Think some people reckon we're living in a Carry On film, where everyone's walking around gagging for it the whole time.


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Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 15:48 - Dec 17 with 2219 viewsDyland

Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 15:40 - Dec 17 by jeera

Are things like dropping notes or Valentines cards stalking?

Man, when I was a kid you sent a girl flowers with a contact number to her works/home/wherever. It was considered romantic and worth a shot.

I'm too old for that but if you want to get to know a stranger, how does that work then if you're too afraid to give a compliment etc?

Is stalking people on FB an acceptable alternative instead?


"when I was a kid you sent a girl flowers with a contact number to her works/home/wherever. It was considered romantic and worth a shot."

Of course. But some bird from school or who worked at the corner shop. Not someone who you have literally just seen for the first time, at their front door :)

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Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 15:49 - Dec 17 with 2211 viewsDyland

Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 15:43 - Dec 17 by jeera

Young chap who was working for my dad at the time, had a thing for this lass and she barely noticed him.

She worked upstairs in some offices in Stowmarket.

One day he grabbed a piece of card and wrote a message, stood in the middle of the road and held it up until one of her colleagues spotted it and got her.

They were together for years. No one even called the police or anything.


It's completely different :)

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Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 15:52 - Dec 17 with 2193 viewsjeera

Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 15:49 - Dec 17 by Dyland

It's completely different :)


I suppose, but the guy might not be a serial asker outer in that fashion. He might have fallen at first sight and figured it was worth a go.

Although it's equally possible he watches them for days first with binoculars first.

That's still ok right?

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Big debate raging on our local Nextdoor app on 15:52 - Dec 17 with 2196 viewsclive_baker

I think it really depends on whether he had his d1ck in his hand while he was saying it. That's not the sort of package she was expecting.

Nah, feels a bit inappropriate to me to accost a lady on her doorstep.

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