| My dad passed away on Wednesday 08:24 - Mar 14 with 6004 views | The_Flashing_Smile |
Spent much of yesterday doing the admin stuff, something I've never done before. There's a surprising amount you have to do, and you don't really have a lot of time before you need to crack on with it.
Something made us laugh - on ringing the Tissue Donation place to see if there's anything they could take (even skin, bone and heart valves are possible apparently)... we found with dad nothing was possible, it was all knackered or too old. Which we thought was quite fitting. In life he always wore things until they were falling apart, beyond repair, getting the absolute full use out of them... and he's done the same with his body!
Another amusing/surprising thing, as part of the funeral prep my brother suggested giving away a few bottles of wine to anyone who wants it at the wake, as dad was a keen winemaker. We thought there might be 5 or 6 knocking about. On searching the spare room, the floor of the garage, and then a big locked cupboard in the garage... we discovered over 100 bottles! All ready to drink, various years and fruits. Funny thing is, neither mum or dad were big wine drinkers. He obviously just loved the process of making it.
We're going to make labels (working title: Ken Dropped A Fruity One, "ABV: Your Guess Is As Good As Ours") and have more than enough to give everyone a bottle. He was a very generous man, so what a great and fitting tribute that will be!
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| My dad passed away on Wednesday on 08:26 - Mar 14 with 3827 views | unbelievablue |
Sorry to hear mate. Hope you're okay. |  |
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| My dad passed away on Wednesday on 08:29 - Mar 14 with 3791 views | Whos_blue |
Aw Flash. That's crap mate. Been there. Done it.
Your post is full of good spirit (and I'm not talking about the wine!).
It sounds like your dad's was a life well lived and the grief sucks right now, but looking back fondly on great memories helps.
Peace to you and your family. |  |
| Distortion becomes somehow pure in its wildness. |
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| My dad passed away on Wednesday on 08:29 - Mar 14 with 3790 views | Zx1988 |
Sorry to hear about your loss, and I hope the entire admin process is as uncomplicated as it's possible to be.
Thanks for the anecdotes, which definitely raised a wry smile at this end! |  |
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| My dad passed away on Wednesday on 08:31 - Mar 14 with 3769 views | JakeITFC |
I’m sorry for your loss Dolly, I hope everything to come goes as well as possible. |  | | |
| My dad passed away on Wednesday on 08:32 - Mar 14 with 3768 views | blueasfook |
Sorry for your loss mate. Take care. |  |
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| My dad passed away on Wednesday on 08:33 - Mar 14 with 3721 views | nodge_blue |
Sorry to hear that. It’s a rough time.
My mum was an amateur artist and I gave away her pictures at the wake. Which I think people liked and also it got rid of a load of stuff. |  |
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| My dad passed away on Wednesday on 08:37 - Mar 14 with 3676 views | giant_stow |
Sorry to hear that Dolly. My condolences. |  |
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| My dad passed away on Wednesday on 08:43 - Mar 14 with 3619 views | hype313 |
Sorry to hear this Dollers, hope you and your family are bearing up ok. |  |
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| My dad passed away on Wednesday on 08:46 - Mar 14 with 3601 views | Guthrum |
Had to do all that 18 months ago with my mother. One of the most difficult bits was having to ring all the relatives and friends to let them know, which took most of the day after she went. Having to repeat the same, still very raw information over and over again.
Plus the doctor was away on holiday, so it took several days to get death certificates and thus go to see the registrar.
She also had some bottles of wine, which my father had brought back from holidays in France. In the 25 years since he died, they had been kept in a garage (too warm in the summer) and a loft (even more so). My brother brought a couple of bottles along when we all met up at Christmas. The red was still marginally fit to drink, the sparkling white very much past its best. |  |
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| My dad passed away on Wednesday on 08:47 - Mar 14 with 3586 views | DJR |
Really sorry to hear that. My thoughts are with you and your family.
The only thing I would say is that the admin stuff does help in some ways to take one's mind off the loss because one just has to get on with it.
Indeed, the admin for my mum as the last survivor (the vast majority of which I did myself including tax returns) took nearly two years to complete. [Post edited 14 Mar 9:03]
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| My dad passed away on Wednesday on 08:51 - Mar 14 with 3509 views | davblue |
All the best to you and the family. |  | | |
| My dad passed away on Wednesday on 08:52 - Mar 14 with 3488 views | Yallop2 |
Sorry to hear that mate thoughts with you and your family |  | | |
| My dad passed away on Wednesday on 08:54 - Mar 14 with 3454 views | bluelagos |
Some lovely words Dolly am sure you will ensure he has a good send off.
Don't forget to look out for yourself too - am sure the road will be a bit bumpy but sounds like you are approaching it in the right spirit.
My Dad's estate is literally this week being sorted - nearly 2 years after his passing - it's not a quick process, so maybe keep a few bottles for yerself :-) |  |
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| My dad passed away on Wednesday on 08:55 - Mar 14 with 3428 views | tonybied |
Sorry for your loss Flash.
At least you have found some light in the dark, though. Great to hear the old man has left some amusing anecdotes in his passing, and that you might be in for an interesting wake! I hope it goes smoothly and that you have all the support you need x |  | | |
| My dad passed away on Wednesday on 08:58 - Mar 14 with 3400 views | Steve_M |
Condolences, glad you found things to make you laugh amidst it all and hope you can keep happy memories in mind as you deal with the aftermath over the next few weeks. |  |
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| My dad passed away on Wednesday on 08:59 - Mar 14 with 3390 views | WicklowBlue |
Condolences Flash, you father sounded like a great man. Sympathies to you, the family and all who knew him. |  | | |
| My dad passed away on Wednesday on 09:00 - Mar 14 with 3388 views | BloomBlue |
Sorry about your loss, but it's important to have a laugh and remember the good times.
When my Mum died years ago, Bother/I went to the funeral directors and we had to select coffin type etc. Well my Dad had always been a hoarder, saving money as he would say. So when he had built some cupboards in the garage he had got hold of some door handles from an old kitchen salesman. The salesmen would have the various types of handles attached to a piece of wood allowing the customer to select which handles they want. Dad had got some of these for free but it meant all the cupboards in the garage had completely different handles. After he had died my Mum would often laugh about about this.
Well.. my Brother/I in the funeral directors selecting Mums coffin, and was then asked what handles we wanted. At this point the Funeral Director pulled out this piece of wood with the various handles on. As you can imagine Brother / I just looked at each other and said garage cupboards and burst out laughing remembering how Mum always found it funny. Laughing so much/loud, the receptionist came into the room to check with the funeral director everything was OK. As the funeral director said its good to laugh.
It was such a small silly thing to laugh about but it made us both feel better |  | | |
| My dad passed away on Wednesday on 09:02 - Mar 14 with 3366 views | NthQldITFC |
Sorry for your loss. |  |
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| My dad passed away on Wednesday on 09:03 - Mar 14 with 3350 views | usm |
Sorry to hear this, Dolly.
Hope you are holding up ok. |  |
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| My dad passed away on Wednesday on 09:09 - Mar 14 with 3280 views | itfc_bucks |
Sorry to hear this pal - sounds like you're processing everything fabulously well and your old man sounds like my sort of bloke!
Just remember that grief has its own way of reaching out and catching you off guard. Be fair to yourself if it happens.
However you feel, at any point in time, is entirely allowed. | | | |
| My dad passed away on Wednesday on 09:19 - Mar 14 with 3156 views | Keno |
Thinking of you Dolls xx
Through all the sorting out, planning and everything over the next few weeks ke time to remember your dad.
and if you ever need anyone to talk to you just give me a shout |  |
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| My dad passed away on Wednesday on 09:22 - Mar 14 with 3139 views | NeedhamChris |
Sorry to hear that, but love those anecdotes - I'm sure there are countless more and will be the things you remember. Also sounds like there'll be plenty of uplifting stories for the wake - but amongst all that do try to look after yourself.
I don't know a lot about your family situation obviously, but if you have the opportunity to try and share some of the tasks then do try to take any help (as tempting as it is to feel responsibility to do everything).
On a practical side - Martin Lewis (what a man) has a guide on his website for what to do when someone passes away - you're more than likely on top of it all but as with everything MSE, it's a helpful and thoughtful list with info linked etc.
Do you have a ST and the chance to go to games to take your mind off it for 90mins?
Sorry again to hear this - look after yourself! | |
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| My dad passed away on Wednesday on 09:22 - Mar 14 with 3133 views | SomethingBlue |
Very sorry to hear that mate. All the best to you and your family. | |
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| My dad passed away on Wednesday on 09:26 - Mar 14 with 3098 views | PhilTWTD |
Very sorry to hear that, Dolly. Wine idea excellent. |  | | |
| My dad passed away on Wednesday on 09:42 - Mar 14 with 2996 views | Pique |
Sorry to hear, best wishes to you and your family. The wine gifts sounds like a lovely idea. |  | | |
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